Getting Your Spouse/ Partner Involved In Your Swimming

Would you like to get your spouse or partner involved in your world of swimming? Here's an article I wrote on the subject for Swimspire: www.swimspire.com/.../ How do you get your spouse or partner involved? Share your tips here! To all of you love birds out there, have a happy Valentine's Day! :kiss1:
  • A really tricky problem, this one, Elaine! For our relationship the following is done in an attempt to make and keep the peace. 1. All training completed in time for the early morning cuppa to be bedside as her eyes start opening. :) 2. Never ask her to be poolside for competitions as 'beep, splash, beep, splash, etc' is very boring for spectators and she always misses my races :( 3. Travel meets must always be holiday destination spots that she has always wanted to visit! Some of the time it works :):) TI (think) I follow a variation of #1 since my wife is an early riser - make the latte and deliver it to her in bed BEFORE I go swim! #2 absolutely!
  • Former Member
    Former Member over 7 years ago
    A really tricky problem, this one, Elaine! For our relationship the following is done in an attempt to make and keep the peace. 1. All training completed in time for the early morning cuppa to be bedside as her eyes start opening. :) 2. Never ask her to be poolside for competitions as 'beep, splash, beep, splash, etc' is very boring for spectators and she always misses my races :( 3. Travel meets must always be holiday destination spots that she has always wanted to visit! Some of the time it works :) :) T
  • Our town fitness center has two pools. There is a water aerobics class in the "play" pool that my wife often does while I do my laps. I've only done one pool meet, but our son was captain of his high school swim team, so we sat through enough meets years ago to know how boring that can be for an outsider. As a runner for 40 years, I ran hundreds of road and track races, threw shot and discus. My wife never saw any of it. She accompanied me to a couple out of state T&F meets in places where she could visit old friends, then left to see them and never saw my meet. When I went to the Betsy Owens OWS in Lake Placid last August, we made it a two day vacation. Not only my wife, but daughter, son-in-law and two grandsons came along. That was an expensive 1 mile.
  • As much as I love my wife, I don't think I want her to be part of my swimming. We've been married for 25 years this year, and I was swimming long before I met her. It's one of 'my things' where I can go off and contemplate and compartmentalize things. She's not really into fitness at all, and probably wouldn't care at all if I just stopped it all (swimming, running, and cycling). Early on when I did try to get her involved...it turned into a disagreement of her thinking I was just trying to show her up. So I stopped that. And honestly I can safely say that now she would likely detests being poolside...as would I. Our 21 year old daughter was on her h.s. swim team. I didn't swim in h.s., nor have ever been on a coached team (other than Masters recently). I had never experienced a h.s. swim meet. The wife and I were excited for daughter's first meet...and then abruptly discouraged after attending it. We discovered that attending indoor swim meets are probably the worst spectator sport there can be. In every pool the smell of chlorine was overcoming, the temperature was way too high for those of us up in the stands fully clothed, the sound of all the screaming was deafening, the mercury lights sometimes blinding -- the heat, the smell, the sound, and the light often combined for a good headache by the time the meet was finished. On top of all that...here in RI there is never a scoreboard. So all through the meet no one in the stands has any idea what the score is. And so...I wouldn't want to put wifey through all that just to count laps, time, or take video. But...if...IF she just came to me and asked to be part of it...that would be great. Dan
  • Former Member
    Former Member over 7 years ago
    I'm glad people have supported spouses, I never married, so I lost my biggest supporter in swimming my father that died in Dec of 2015. In Dec 2015 I was not swimming at the time. He would have enjoyed my medals at senior Olympics. My mother who is somewhat ill couldn't attend that.
  • Nice article Elaine. Thanks, Swim! I received your (terrific!) PM, and I will respond when I get more time to write more than this quick post. As I mentioned in my article, Bruce and I support each other in our passions/ interests. Sure enough, we are in Savannah selling Bruce's art glass jewelry at a craft show! (It's slow at the moment...) Thanks to you and all of the others who posted on this thread. Keep the comments, stories, and tips coming! Time to get back to work! Customers have gathered! :D
  • Thanks, Swim! I received your (terrific!) PM, and I will respond when I get more time to write more than this quick post. As I mentioned in my article, Bruce and I support each other in our passions/ interests. Sure enough, we are in Savannah selling Bruce's art glass jewelry at a craft show! (It's slow at the moment...) Thanks to you and all of the others who posted on this thread. Keep the comments, stories, and tips coming! Time to get back to work! Customers have gathered! :D Supporting each other makes life much easier and enjoyable. I swam at a meet today where there was older couple sitting behind me. He swam while she took the 25y splits for him with a stopwatch. Made me think of this thread.
  • A really tricky problem, this one, Elaine! For our relationship the following is done in an attempt to make and keep the peace. 1. All training completed in time for the early morning cuppa to be bedside as her eyes start opening. :) T I (think) I follow a variation of #1 since my wife is an early riser - make the latte and deliver it to her in bed BEFORE I go swim! You guys are sweethearts to do that for your wives. That's exactly what I'm talking about! :agree: I'm glad people have supported spouses, I never married, so I lost my biggest supporter in swimming my father that died in Dec of 2015. In Dec 2015 I was not swimming at the time. He would have enjoyed my medals at senior Olympics. My mother who is somewhat ill couldn't attend that. :bighug:Cinc, I'm sorry to hear about your dad. Supporting each other makes life much easier and enjoyable. :agree: I swam at a meet today where there was older couple sitting behind me. He swam while she took the 25y splits for him with a stopwatch. Made me think of this thread. Showing gratitude for the support you receive takes it a step further. Gratitude is huge in our relationship, and it's what keeps us happy together. A sincere "thank you" (especially with a hug!) feels good to give AND to receive! Regarding that couple sitting behind you at the meet, good on her for helping her husband! :applaud: In return, I hope he did something nice for her as well. :) By the way, how did you do at the meet? I hope you had a great time and were pleased with your races!
  • Regarding that couple sitting behind you at the meet, good on her for helping her husband! :applaud: In return, I hope he did something nice for her as well. :) By the way, how did you do at the meet? I hope you had a great time and were pleased with your races! I'm sure he did something nice in return. They both seemed happy. And I was happy with my times. Two personal bests (since joining USMS 4-5 years ago). Slooowly inching closer to my high school times (from the 1980's). Missed a 3rd personal best by .12 secs. And all breaststroke events (50, 100, 200). Met and talked with some "regulars" and a couple of first timers. That's always fun.