Hello everyone!
i have a 14 yr old daughter who has been swimming with a USA swimming club for about 2yrs now. She is the only person in our family to swim, so naturally I feel in a bit over my head at times, though she seems to fit in well in the swimming world. I’m not sure how my daughter ranks against her peers, or her just others in her age group for that matter, nor what is a “good time” or “bad time”. Given she is not in the top swim group at her club, I’m get the sense her times about average for her age or perhaps a bit below. So anyways, I’m wondering what I can do to be a “good swim parent”, how far do I go when she adds time and how happy should I be when she drops a little time? Thanks for all your help! I’ve put a couple of her short course yards times below.
100fly: 1:02.51
100back:1:02.35
100free: 56.32
200free: 2:00.59
200back: 2:13.15
200IM: 2:18.87
200fly: 2:24.11
50free: 26.15
I had kids in baseball, softball, gymnastics, soccer, & volleyball. Never swimmers, but the sport is immaterial. I had one kid in the absolute worst volleyball team in the state, never won a single set in any match, but he was named the team MVP. Why? He tried harder no matter the score.
Encouragement and support, regardless of the tier she's placed in. Go to every event she wants to enter, cheer loudly, but not like an ass. Big hugs when it's done. Any time she breaks one of those marks by even a half a second, it's cause for celebration.
Her times are pretty darn solid for only having swum for a couple of years. Just encourage her. Talk to her coach, have her set up goals and a plan to get there. Try to help her along, and if you are like me, you'll just have to have the coach tell her that eating 700 calories in Twizzlers before a 400IM isn't smart (because at that age, Dad knows squat). Being a swim dad to 13-14 y/o girls is freaking HARD. But just support. Make sure she knows you are there to support her. If she moves to a group that has 5AM practice times, make sure she knows that you'll support her enough to suck it up and get up to take her. If she is practicing 4 times a week, but wants to improve, let her know you'll take here to 6, or 8 or 9....however many. Just make sure she knows you (and presumably Mom) are there for her.
On adds and drops. At that age, don't expect her to drop at many meets. Mine are at a meet this weekend, and I'm watching the times, and watching my good swimmer having a rough meet (+5.2, +2.7, +5.5 in 2Fly, 1Back, and 2Free with the 4IM still to go). She has only dropped in 3 events from this time last year (and 2 of them are 200's of stroke, which she had only done once since she was 12 last year, and those weren't normal events). But their bodies at that age are much more affected by a hard training regimen, and they respond pretty well to a taper. Any drop is good. My other swimmer is a little tapered, trying to make our LSC Championship meet, and she is dropping a little.
Keep her having FUN!. As a coach of 34 years of swimming , too many parents push & drive their kids so much that they walk away from swimming as soon as they get to H.S. or further.
orca1946 hit it exactly on the head - keep her having fun. He and I have been coaching about the same amount of time. IMHO, the best swim parent is the one who knows absolutely nothing about the sport except they want their child to have a smile on their face before and after practice and meets. The two most important questions after a practice or meet: a) Did you have fun? and b) where do you want to eat?
And, BTW, your daughters times are pretty good for 14 years old. She might never make the Junior or senior nationals, but she would have always been on the high school state teams I coached in Minnesota and someone so versatile they could swim any event. That makes coaching alot of fun.
PW
Those times are very respectable for a 14 year old, with only 2 years of club swimming. One would assume that she'll only continue to improve.
Either way, the best advise is two words..."great job". She knows where she's at time wise, and if you're actively involved in the sport (as a parent) - it's only a matter of time where you'll know where the bar lies. As a former swim parent, the best thing to do is be happy with the good times, and be supportive during the disappointing ones. There's going to be all kinds of ups and downs. It's better to let the coach provide the feedback, and for the parents to be the cheering section.
...The best part is - is that you're there for her, taking her to practices and meets. The high school and college years go by incredibly fast, and she will never forget her swimming days, and your commitment to being her support system. I speak from experience. Enjoy the moment, and the brief 8 year career, should she decide to move on to NCAA swimming.
Since most USAS swimmers never qualify for their local age-group (JO) or Senior championships, your daughter is relatively good.
That's a darn good point! I believe that our LSC had only 12% of the swimmers represented at our championship meet last Summer (likely more qualified, but those who do, generally go, especially the age groupers). Doing that in year 2 as a 14 year old is incredibly impressive.
And actually, many of those times are Sectional qualifying, at least in the Southern Zone. Most of those are AA's, some close to AAA.
www.usaswimming.org/.../2020motivationaltimes-top16.pdf
Also, here is a great site that I use to see where my kids are relative to the LSC and nation. Even can compared to collegiate swimmers. www.swimmingrank.com
Hi Jay, ultimately you are the parent and need to determine how much you would like to be involved - but you have the full right to educate yourself on swimming as much as you want. As others have mentioned here, the USA Swimming Motivational Times are very helpful in determining your daughter's level for her age group. This is a good article offering tips on how to be the best swim parent you can be: www.swimspire.com/.../
Hope this is helpful for you! All the best to you and your daughter!
