I'm wondering if I can get some advice from some of you familiar with youth swim teams and how they deal with disciplinary issues. As a backdrop, some of you may remember my previous description of my son as having Asperger's syndrome. He is 11 years old and, as you might imagine, a target of bullying and harassment in school. One of the offenders is a boy on his swim team who is 12 and much more physically mature. In school he has been cursing at my son, falsely telling one of the teachers that my son is "talking" and getting him in trouble (occurring on almost a daily basis, I have filed a complaint against the teacher), degrading him, etc. Most of this is primarily a school issue, but there was one event that I think relates to swimming and the team coaches should know about. One day, one of the trio of bullies went up to my son and asked him if he was any good. My son answered "yes" ( in reality he is OK, 35 sec 50 yard free). The kid called out to the swimmer I mentioned and said "hey, ....says he is good.". The swimmer responded "well, I got a 26 f...r, top that. You suck.". They essentially lured him into a trap, and he is innocent/socially awkward enough to fall into it.
My opinion of young swimmers in general has been very favorable. Most of them are extremely sweet and good kids, so I was very surprised to hear about this one. I am wondering if this type of behavior, particularly degrading fellow swimmers, is one that I should bring up to the head coach. While it did not occur during practice or a meet, I do believe it is relevant to the type of swimmer and person they expect on the team. I do not think any action would be taken at this point, but at the very least the coach could talk to him or even keep a mental record should it continue.
Any thoughts? I really feel that it might have more of an impact than anything the school could say or do.
Icidentally, this swimmer's best time ws 28.5, 55th out of 63 for the 11-12 year-olds at JO. I looked it up:)
Parents
Former Member
I'm wondering if I can get some advice from some of you familiar with youth swim teams and how they deal with disciplinary issues.
A conversation with the coach is in order.
Sharing your concerns might allow him to provide the others with a greater insight as to what your son might have to go through each day to day. A team environment should foster unity as corny as that might sound. Boys will be boys, but this is clearly an opportunity for the bullies to learn some compassion for those with learning difficulties. Children with Asperger's can quite often be misunderstood.
The coach, with your permission, should speak with these boys privately and see if he can offer them a bit more understanding of their actions. Who knows, they may wind up being his biggest supporters in school where the bullying goes on unchecked.
Hope you find a nice resolve for your son.
I'm wondering if I can get some advice from some of you familiar with youth swim teams and how they deal with disciplinary issues.
A conversation with the coach is in order.
Sharing your concerns might allow him to provide the others with a greater insight as to what your son might have to go through each day to day. A team environment should foster unity as corny as that might sound. Boys will be boys, but this is clearly an opportunity for the bullies to learn some compassion for those with learning difficulties. Children with Asperger's can quite often be misunderstood.
The coach, with your permission, should speak with these boys privately and see if he can offer them a bit more understanding of their actions. Who knows, they may wind up being his biggest supporters in school where the bullying goes on unchecked.
Hope you find a nice resolve for your son.
