Equipment Rep
Trains with every piece of equipment available at all times.
The Luddite
Trains with nothing. Only uses a loin cloth and goggles in workout.
The Barnacle
Leaves right on your feet. Couldn't count to five or ten if his life depnded on it.
The Coach
Not an actual coach, but someone who is consumed with technique. Swimming is a precise set of moves that can be broken down, categorized, and scientifically analyzed.
The Jaded
Could care less about technique. Just wants to swim and leave the analysis to the eggheads.
The Swimaholic
Trains at least 10 swimming workouts a week. Anything less is viewed as not trying.
Fast Guy who Never Trains
Shows up once a month and breaks national records in practice.
Hardest Working Man in the Swim Business
Trains like a ferocious animal in workout, but has no speed when it comes to racing.
Lane Guy
Works out in a lane that is far too fast or slow for him.
The Crack Guy
Dude, pull your swimsuit up or get a bigger size.
The Newbie
Shows up to practice in board shorts and a scuba mask.
_________________
As for myself, I would fall into the categories of Luddite and Jaded. Also, I wrote this from a male perspective, but the women are included as well. Any other stereotypes?
Just Go With It - 5 seconds before your next sendoff, the non-swimmer in the next lane asks you such a random question that you don't know how to answer it. Play along! Yes, I do hold the record for "the most times going back and forth in the pool," thank you for asking! Yes, I am the next Michael Phelps, even though I'm much shorter, slower, and older than he is! Yes, an isolated system, if not already in its state of thermodynamic equilibrium, spontaneously evolves towards it!
7083
Cap On Sideways - This trailblazer isn't bothered by the fact that no one else in the pool is wearing their cap this way. Trendsetting requires boldness!
Dogma - Asks you for stroke advice, but then refuses your suggestions since they're contrary to how she was originally taught to swim.
The Colonel - Your best guess is that his time as a swim official ended somewhere around 1979. He gives you unprompted stroke and turn feedback straight out of a time machine. Aren't you glad he told you about your illegal backstroke flip turns and illegal head submergence in breaststroke? He's not a fan of goggles and refers to jammers as trunks. He begrudgingly acknowledges that butterfly is a legal stroke but fondly remembers the days of the 150 and 300 IM.
Charles Atlas - Mustachioed and muscular, this 60-ish man struts around the pool deck with his chest puffed out and a proud grin on his face. Then he gets into the end lane with the water walkers and does head-up doggy paddle with that same grin.
That Guy Who Resurrect Long Dormant Threads on Discussion Forums – a Forumite who:
A: is vying for top 10 poster status
B: likes seeing his avatar surfing the waves in a Hasslehoffian fashion
3: well... maybe there are only 2 characteristics of this stereotype
That Guy Who Resurrect Long Dormant Threads on Discussion Forums – a Forumite who:
A: is vying for top 10 poster status
B: likes seeing his avatar surfing the waves in a Hasslehoffian fashion
3: well... maybe there are only 2 characteristics of this stereotype
c: Refers to himself in the third person.
d: Makes random references that no one understands. Derby.
That Guy Who Resurrect Long Dormant Threads on Discussion Forums – a Forumite who:
A: is vying for top 10 poster status
B: likes seeing his avatar surfing the waves in a Hasslehoffian fashion
3: well... maybe there are only 2 characteristics of this stereotype
Z: Abandoned his previous MUCH CUTER avatar :bighug: with the very round head and very skinny body for the aformentioned Hasslehoffian avatar. :cry:
Z: Abandoned his previous MUCH CUTER avatar :bighug: with the very round head and very skinny body for the aformentioned Hasslehoffian avatar. :cry:
W: Secretly misses the Hello Kitty avatar that the Moderator Overlords bestowed upon him.
Correction. Should read:
A (or E or I or O or U): I'd like to buy a vowel.
I got a double word score and triple letter for the W. Now I've got enough points to put a hotel on Free Parking! :banana: