I just became the coach of my first swim team, and I, being a male, am having a hard time with the whole period thing. My girls are middle school level, and a little shy about the subject, as am I. Now, I know that you can swim on your period by using a tampon, but they cringed at the idea. However, on a 20 girl team, I've got as many as 6-7 girls sitting out daily because of it. I know that's far FAR too high. I'm about this close to going out and buying a box of tampons to shove in their face if they don't dress.
So my questions are:
How necessary is it that you wear a tampon? Is it an every day thing? are there times when it's worse than others?
And, how can I easily make the lives of the swimmers who don't swim (and keep in mind it has to be for a group of 6-7 people) a living hell. I need a dry land work out that can be done on the pool deck that takes little effort to watch (so I can coach the other girls) and something they can't really slack off - I keep giving them push ups and they barely go down.
I really can't think of anything outside of making the actual swim session fun, so if you guys have ideas on how to do that too it might work, too. It need to work on something important though.
It sounds like some girls aren't lying, and are embarressed. It sounds like some girls are taking advantage of the situation. The difficult thing is, the embarrassed ones are going to get hurt by the ones taking advantage.
BTW, tampons are not for everyone. My daughter tried and tried, and just does not like them....so she sits out a couple of days a month. When she was 12 until she was about 13.5 she had her periods every 20-21 days, which was really bad and she was not a heavy person, she started when she weighed 90 pounds and is about 110 now at 15. This is not a thing a mother forces on a daughter, this is about her body and it is her decision how to handle it.
If it is a school team and there are no try-outs to be on the team, then your job is to get the most out of the ones who want to participate fully, and the most(which will not be as much) on the ones who are slackers. Then the ones who paticipate fully get to prime swim spots on relays, and events, because they earned it.
This is a good response. It does sound like you have a few girls with some "issues" regarding their period. Yes, it's perfectly understandable that they would have embarrassment issues. Given the way a few of the men on this board have reacted to even talking about menstruation, and the way that girls that age can be pretty mean to each other, it is a potentially very embarrassing matter. I wish that were not the case--it shouldn't be.
ML--I feel for you as it does sound like some of the girls are taking advantage. How could it be otherwise with the numbers you've given? However, your last two posts make you sound a little harsh. You're not going to have much success coaching girls if you think that berating them is an effective strategy. My suggestion was to make sure they know they can't run roughshod over you and miss practice on a whim. A note from home lets the parents know what's going on and leaves you free and clear when a girl doesn't swim very well at the end of the season.
I don't think George or Elise are allowing for the idea that some of your girls are just being lazy. They are not delicate flowers that have to be tiptoed around. However, girls are different than boys. Menstruation is not a fun or easy transition for a *** girl. The girl you say is "incredibly fat" is already aware of that fact and probably not real happy she's that way. To take those facts into consideration is a MUST if you want to be successful coaching girls. It has nothing to do with talking down or pampering women because we can't take the tough stuff. It has to do with using the best psychology to get the best results.
As I told my husband when we first got married and started lifting weights together, women don't tend to respond well to negative feedback. Telling me I'm a wuss and that your grandmother can lift more than I can will not tend to make me motivated. Instead I'll think you're a jerk and go find somewhere else to lift. However, if you tell me I'm doing great I'll give you even more effort. I think (and correct me if I'm wrong gals) that most women respond better to positive reinforcement.
Let the girls know that you have expectations. Make their parents aware of those expectations and their daughters' practice habits. Require a note and then don't judge a parent for the decision they make. That's where you let the girls who practice more reap the benefits and those that don't see where that gets them. The monkey's off your back that way. Be careful, as a coach, not to judge the parents too harshly. It's especially easy to do when you aren't a parent.
It sounds like some girls aren't lying, and are embarressed. It sounds like some girls are taking advantage of the situation. The difficult thing is, the embarrassed ones are going to get hurt by the ones taking advantage.
BTW, tampons are not for everyone. My daughter tried and tried, and just does not like them....so she sits out a couple of days a month. When she was 12 until she was about 13.5 she had her periods every 20-21 days, which was really bad and she was not a heavy person, she started when she weighed 90 pounds and is about 110 now at 15. This is not a thing a mother forces on a daughter, this is about her body and it is her decision how to handle it.
If it is a school team and there are no try-outs to be on the team, then your job is to get the most out of the ones who want to participate fully, and the most(which will not be as much) on the ones who are slackers. Then the ones who paticipate fully get to prime swim spots on relays, and events, because they earned it.
This is a good response. It does sound like you have a few girls with some "issues" regarding their period. Yes, it's perfectly understandable that they would have embarrassment issues. Given the way a few of the men on this board have reacted to even talking about menstruation, and the way that girls that age can be pretty mean to each other, it is a potentially very embarrassing matter. I wish that were not the case--it shouldn't be.
ML--I feel for you as it does sound like some of the girls are taking advantage. How could it be otherwise with the numbers you've given? However, your last two posts make you sound a little harsh. You're not going to have much success coaching girls if you think that berating them is an effective strategy. My suggestion was to make sure they know they can't run roughshod over you and miss practice on a whim. A note from home lets the parents know what's going on and leaves you free and clear when a girl doesn't swim very well at the end of the season.
I don't think George or Elise are allowing for the idea that some of your girls are just being lazy. They are not delicate flowers that have to be tiptoed around. However, girls are different than boys. Menstruation is not a fun or easy transition for a *** girl. The girl you say is "incredibly fat" is already aware of that fact and probably not real happy she's that way. To take those facts into consideration is a MUST if you want to be successful coaching girls. It has nothing to do with talking down or pampering women because we can't take the tough stuff. It has to do with using the best psychology to get the best results.
As I told my husband when we first got married and started lifting weights together, women don't tend to respond well to negative feedback. Telling me I'm a wuss and that your grandmother can lift more than I can will not tend to make me motivated. Instead I'll think you're a jerk and go find somewhere else to lift. However, if you tell me I'm doing great I'll give you even more effort. I think (and correct me if I'm wrong gals) that most women respond better to positive reinforcement.
Let the girls know that you have expectations. Make their parents aware of those expectations and their daughters' practice habits. Require a note and then don't judge a parent for the decision they make. That's where you let the girls who practice more reap the benefits and those that don't see where that gets them. The monkey's off your back that way. Be careful, as a coach, not to judge the parents too harshly. It's especially easy to do when you aren't a parent.
