I am sorry this topic has absolutely nothing to do with swimming, but that is the weirdest thing that ever happened to me and who else would I share it with but my beloved swimming community :-)))
Anyways, here is what happened to me today.I went to Mall of America to do some shopping.I mean I finally set aside money to invest into something non-related to swimming.I am definitely not a shopaholic, but today I felt the urge to get into some new clothes.Well, afew hours after browsing that huge concentration of temptations I gathered quite e few purchases.To top it off I decided to get myself some cool jeans, so I ended up in one of the clothing shops.I had some trouble finding my size and I caught an eye of A GORGEOUS young lady that was working there and asked her to help me out(well, because she was so good-looking, I obviously had even more trouble finding stuff :-))).She turned out to be a sweet-heart and pretty much guided me through all my shopping experience at this little shop and I finally had 2 pair of jeans that I liked after trying out thousands of them(well, not exactly that many, but you know what I mean).So it was time for me to go, but I kinda felt reluctant to leave without having a little chat with that cutie.So I asked her name and stuff and we had a pleasant little conversation.Man, she told me to stop by some time to say hello :-)))Maybe she liked me?'Cause I surely liked her, lol:))
Anyways we finished talking, smiled to each other, wished each other good night and all those things and I headed out home thinking about nothing but that girl I just met.
Ok, guess what happened when I got home?I realised that the girl totally stole my brains at the moment when we were talking, BECAUSE I LEFT THE STRORE WITH THE JEANS IN MY HANDS FORGETTING(I MEAN FORGETTING!!!!) TO PAY FOR THEM!!!
OH my GOD!!!I never shoplift or anything of a kind and never ever anything like that happened to me!
Should I go back there tomorrow and pay or is that going to look weird?The most amazing part is that the jeans had those magnetic devices but they obviously never got activated or whatnot...
WOW, I mean WOOOOOOOOOOW.I must have really liked the girl, 'cause my brain was obviously paralized for that moment...I promised her I would stop by again :-)))She told me when she works.I was trying to be a decent guy and not jump into the whole "Can I have your number" thing right away, lol.
Man, all I have to say is : women are trouble , or from the woman's view on the situation it could be: men are so stupid!!!
Former Member
only "slightly" better...I recall telling you I wasn't a big fan of that one either...LOL!! :D
Newmastersswimmer
butt it's my best side...
:dedhorse: :dedhorse: :rofl:
Forgive me if I derail the topic, but I've had experiences with Female swimmers before... *commence flashback sequence*
I remember last April when I went to my second Swim Meet and was attracted to this beautiful female swimmer who was probably seven years older than I.
It was like heaven because I was competing in a very beautiful pool and the beautiful woman I had an attraction to was a fellow team mate.
...a week after the meet, I was still phased that I wrote and recorded a song, called "(I'm No) Competitor" and poured my heart out and even mentioned her name in the song like a love-striken sap.
I wanted to send it to her, but I was too nervous so she never heard the song, and good thing, too.
...about three months later, I saw her again at my first Long-Course Championship Meet (it was my third and probably last meet, sadly) and learned that she was seeing someone for a few years, whom was practically old enough to be her father.
Since this woman lived in a neighboring city, it didn't hurt so much, but then again, I've never had any luck with women, which depresses me.
They're all either married (but don't have their ring, or I can't see it, due to poor vision) or they're engaged to be married, or engaged to be engaged, have a boyfriend they've been seeing for either a few months or a few years or they're ***, yes, I said ***, but since I'm still a naive 28-year-old, sometimes I don't see the obvious.
Are there ***ANY*** single women anymore??? It's frustrating and I have to agree that women tend to be trouble, despite me being the nice gentlemen.
Re: loosey goosey shoulders. My wife has very loose joints. I have very loose joints. Two of my children have very loose joints. The third,our youngest son has joints that are way beyond loose. When he read that it is impossible to kiss your elbow he proceeded to show me it wasn't.He doesn't have joint pain much,but he is young.
Looking back at the original post starting this thread,the point was that the attractiveness of the attractor lead to trouble on the part of the attractee.It seems therefore that attractive people are trouble. Does this mean they should require a warning sticker or rather should one have to sign a waiver to be in their presence:dedhorse: :dedhorse: :dedhorse: :rofl:
Well, as we all know, Geek says waivers aren't worth the paper they're written on. But since Speedo-Man looks ferocious and is probably not getting any girls, we can safely disregard Geek's advice. I'm sure there are some men here that could use a warning sticker either because they are fabulously attractive and/or outrageous forum flirts like the subject of the foregoing set theory analysis.
But Allen, from a psychiatric perspective, does the attractive of the attractor always lead to trouble for the attractee? Maybe the attractee has a deep seeded insecurity complex and requires arm candy to validate his existence? Then the attractiveness of the attractor is a psychological benefit, not trouble. Or, maybe the attractiveness of the attractor endlessly attracts the attractive attractee. They live happily ever and, after producing genetically magnificent swimming specimens, become USMS swimmers and posters. No trouble there. Unless they are breaststrokers. :rofl:
It would be better, and much less trouble, if people with loosey goosey shoulder tendons wore warning stickers. Then, even if they were highly attractive, any potential swimming attactees would run screaming so as to not produce offspring with physiologically challenging shoulder conditions that would be subject to injury and a subsequent diagnosis of bad technique. That is real trouble. :rofl: :dedhorse:
I'm sure there are some men here that could use a warning sticker either because they are fabulously attractive and/or outrageous forum flirts like the subject of the foregoing set theory analysis posted by the fort
uhmmm...I see that you are referring to someone around here as an outrageous forum flirt....hmmmm....and I have been accused of being a "sort of flirt" before (but only in the most abstract sense of the word of course).....or maybe you are referring to a certain young Englishman?....hmmm.....I would hate for this to lead to another limerick assault now Ms. Forte...You know how much I hate having to do that now...It goes against my normally ultra-civil nature ...LOL!!
Newmastersswimmer
I'm sure there are some men here that could use a warning sticker either because they are fabulously attractive and/or outrageous forum flirts like the subject of the foregoing set theory analysis posted by the fort
uhmmm...I see that you are referring to someone around here as an outrageous forum flirt....hmmmm....and I have been accused of being a "sort of flirt" before (but only in the most abstract sense of the word of course).....or maybe you are referring to a certain young Englishman?....hmmm.....I would hate for this to lead to another limerick assault now Ms. Forte...You know how much I hate having to do that now...It goes against my normally ultra-civil nature ...LOL!!
Newmastersswimmer
You have to watch out for English swimmers...they normally come with warning labels...not me though...I'm here for the breaststroke!
Are there ***ANY*** single women anymore??? It's frustrating and I have to agree that women tend to be trouble, despite me being the nice gentlemen.
Fred the raccoon here (My picture is on the left). Leonard foolishly stepped out to get a cup of tea without locking his computer, so I thought I'd help you out, since raccoons know everything and the ladies find us irresistable.
1) Women love compliments. Notice the little details. Things like "Nice stripes", "Love your fur" or "Nice tail" go a long way. If she's been rolling in something pungent, be sure to tell her you like it.
2) Women love thoughtful gifts. A freshly caught fish or a piece of jelly doughnut scavenged off the side of the road drives 'em wild.
3) Be well groomed. Be sure to take a flea & tick bath often. Use dye on the tail stripes if they are getting gray.
4) Women love romantic settings. Make sure your den is clean and well stocked with goodies like dead mice and half-filled cans of beer that you find.
5) Never start a relationship by saying "Pull my finger...."
6) Lie like mad. Tell them you want kids, that you work at a raccoon rescue center and that you have several unopened bags of potato chips back at your den.
7) Enlist her friends - all women believe that a guy isn't happy unless he's in a relationship. Encourage this psychotic delusion by lying per item 6.
8) View the movie "The Wedding Crashers" until you can recite it by heart. The line where he says "Doctors tell us we only use 10% of our brains, but I think we only use 10% of our hearts." is pure genius.
9 ) Hit the internet for sites like raccoondating.com and maskedlove.com
Ooops, the boy wonder is about to return with his tea. Time to look cute...
-Fred T. Raccoon
Fred the raccoon here (My picture is on the left). Leonard foolishly stepped out to get a cup of tea without locking his computer, so I thought I'd help you out, since raccoons know everything and the ladies find us irresistable.
1) Women love compliments. Notice the little details. Things like "Nice stripes", "Love your fur" or "Nice tail" go a long way. If she's been rolling in something pungent, be sure to tell her you like it.
2) Women love thoughtful gifts. A freshly caught fish or a piece of jelly doughnut scavenged off the side of the road drives 'em wild.
3) Be well groomed. Be sure to take a flea & tick bath often. Use dye on the tail stripes if they are getting gray.
4) Women love romantic settings. Make sure your den is clean and well stocked with goodies like dead mice and half-filled cans of beer that you find.
5) Never start a relationship by saying "Pull my finger...."
6) Lie like mad. Tell them you want kids, that you work at a raccoon rescue center and that you have several unopened bags of potato chips back at your den.
7) Enlist her friends - all women believe that a guy isn't happy unless he's in a relationship. Encourage this psychotic delusion by lying per item 6.
8) View the movie "The Wedding Crashers" until you can recite it by heart. The line where he says "Doctors tell us we only use 10% of our brains, but I think we only use 10% of our hearts." is pure genius.
9 ) Hit the internet for sites like raccoondating.com and maskedlove.com
Ooops, the boy wonder is about to return with his tea. Time to look cute...
-Fred T. Raccoon
Hold up...Fred. I do the lady-handling advice here pal.
Anyhow, I tried "nice-tail" I got slapped in the face. When I went to maskedlove.com I ended up in HR.
Maybe these tips should carry a disclaimer saying they only work for woodland creastures.
2) Women love thoughtful gifts. A freshly caught fish or a piece of jelly doughnut scavenged off the side of the road drives 'em wild.
-Fred T. Raccoon
This seems very true. I think it's better if the gifts are given when not expected too. (Although you'll surely be in the doghouse if you forget anniversaries.) If you get her something on her "list," it's less valued because she thought of it. If you actually manage to divine what she wants and purchase it without her knowledge -- a huge feat -- it will yield more oohs and ahs.
Oddly, though, women don't seems to like love sick saps pouring their hearts out. They view it as a sign of weakness. So be careful, Sonic. You have to get the balance of thoughtfulness and relative indifference just right to keep them interested.
This seems very true. I think it's better if the gifts are given when not expected too. (quote]
Yes never, ever buy flowers when you're supposed to (birthdays, anniversaries, St Vals). Buy them randomly...and preferably get them delivered at work in front of all the other women who will then get jealous (the recieving women love this).
