I am relatively new to the swimming culture, so I hope I can get some insight from you more experienced folks. My kids swim for Curl Burke in the DC area. Many of you may be aware of the new allegations against Rick Curl (cofounder and president of CuBu), as well as the recent allegations against another prominent coach and franchise owner on the team, Noah Rucker.
I'm in a little bit of a quandary because my wife and two other moms, parents of three best friends on the team, are very antsy about continuing with the team for a few reasons, not least of which are the recent allegations of improper behavior. I realize that this probably has occurred or does occur on a widespread basis, and in the case of Rick Curl the alleged period of impropriety was 30 years ago. All 4 of us had a discussion last night and I said I didn't believe that Curl Burke, even if the allegations are true, would be more likely to hire child molesters than anyone else. The organization is larger than Rick Curl. My wife and the other moms seem to believe the opposite, that a child molester would be less stringent with hiring policies.
I tend to believe that some of these situations are the fault of parents, who freely let their children go to out of town swim meets alone with coaches, or who let them give rides, etc. I would like to believe that I could protect my child whether a coach has done something wrong in the past or not.
My son really loves (in an appropriate way) his swim coach, they have a great rapport. His swimming has taken off with this guy. I see potential conflict with my wife on this. i don't think my daughter would care what team she swims on, as long as she is with her amigas. But I'm pretty adamant that my son should swim with the team he prefers. Am I off base on this? Any advice for me?
Thanks.
I hope that you are not correct that this "probably ... does occur on a regular basis." People who abuse their places of power with children are hopefully few and far between.
I also hope that you don't really believe that some of these situations are "the fault of parents..." There is never any excuse for a coach, teacher, scout leader, priest or anyone else to whom we give access to our children, to abuse them.
I do not know anything about the team where your son swims. I assume, because of its name, that it is in some way associated with Rick Curl. After reading the news stories and the Settlement Agreement with the pro forma complaint attached, it seems likely that USA Swimming will take some type of action so I think you should weigh weigh how those disruptions would affect the team and in particular your son, when you decide if you should stay or leave.
Perhaps I didn't explain myself well. It goes without saying that the perpetrating coach, teacher, etc. is primarily at fault. HOWEVER, I'm not sure if you read the recent story about a 4 year-old boy who shot himself in the head with the gun his step-dad left in the back seat of his unlocked car. There are guns out there, and there are child molesters our there. You take precautions with your children. I would NEVER let my 13 year-old daughter go on a trip alone with a male coach as her caretaker. That is plain stupid. Nor would I let my 16-17 year-old kid leave the pool with his/her coach, or for that matter go out without knowing her whereabouts. I'm pretty sure these coaches pick the low hanging fruit.
I hope that you are not correct that this "probably ... does occur on a regular basis." People who abuse their places of power with children are hopefully few and far between.
I also hope that you don't really believe that some of these situations are "the fault of parents..." There is never any excuse for a coach, teacher, scout leader, priest or anyone else to whom we give access to our children, to abuse them.
I do not know anything about the team where your son swims. I assume, because of its name, that it is in some way associated with Rick Curl. After reading the news stories and the Settlement Agreement with the pro forma complaint attached, it seems likely that USA Swimming will take some type of action so I think you should weigh weigh how those disruptions would affect the team and in particular your son, when you decide if you should stay or leave.
Perhaps I didn't explain myself well. It goes without saying that the perpetrating coach, teacher, etc. is primarily at fault. HOWEVER, I'm not sure if you read the recent story about a 4 year-old boy who shot himself in the head with the gun his step-dad left in the back seat of his unlocked car. There are guns out there, and there are child molesters our there. You take precautions with your children. I would NEVER let my 13 year-old daughter go on a trip alone with a male coach as her caretaker. That is plain stupid. Nor would I let my 16-17 year-old kid leave the pool with his/her coach, or for that matter go out without knowing her whereabouts. I'm pretty sure these coaches pick the low hanging fruit.
