I am relatively new to the swimming culture, so I hope I can get some insight from you more experienced folks. My kids swim for Curl Burke in the DC area. Many of you may be aware of the new allegations against Rick Curl (cofounder and president of CuBu), as well as the recent allegations against another prominent coach and franchise owner on the team, Noah Rucker.
I'm in a little bit of a quandary because my wife and two other moms, parents of three best friends on the team, are very antsy about continuing with the team for a few reasons, not least of which are the recent allegations of improper behavior. I realize that this probably has occurred or does occur on a widespread basis, and in the case of Rick Curl the alleged period of impropriety was 30 years ago. All 4 of us had a discussion last night and I said I didn't believe that Curl Burke, even if the allegations are true, would be more likely to hire child molesters than anyone else. The organization is larger than Rick Curl. My wife and the other moms seem to believe the opposite, that a child molester would be less stringent with hiring policies.
I tend to believe that some of these situations are the fault of parents, who freely let their children go to out of town swim meets alone with coaches, or who let them give rides, etc. I would like to believe that I could protect my child whether a coach has done something wrong in the past or not.
My son really loves (in an appropriate way) his swim coach, they have a great rapport. His swimming has taken off with this guy. I see potential conflict with my wife on this. i don't think my daughter would care what team she swims on, as long as she is with her amigas. But I'm pretty adamant that my son should swim with the team he prefers. Am I off base on this? Any advice for me?
Thanks.
reachforthewall.com/.../.
I wouldn't be surprised if other allegations are made ...
I know my daughter's swim team has been getting calls about availability from freaked out parents.
I realize that this probably has occurred or does occur on a widespread basis, and in the case of Rick Curl the alleged period of impropriety was 30 years ago.
I tend to believe that some of these situations are the fault of parents, who freely let their children go to out of town swim meets alone with coaches, or who let them give rides, etc. I would like to believe that I could protect my child whether a coach has done something wrong in the past or not.
My son really loves (in an appropriate way) his swim coach, they have a great rapport. His swimming has taken off with this guy. I see potential conflict with my wife on this.
I hope that you are not correct that this "probably ... does occur on a regular basis." People who abuse their places of power with children are hopefully few and far between.
I also hope that you don't really believe that some of these situations are "the fault of parents..." There is never any excuse for a coach, teacher, scout leader, priest or anyone else to whom we give access to our children, to abuse them.
I do not know anything about the team where your son swims. I assume, because of its name, that it is in some way associated with Rick Curl. After reading the news stories and the Settlement Agreement with the pro forma complaint attached, it seems likely that USA Swimming will take some type of action so I think you should weigh weigh how those disruptions would affect the team and in particular your son, when you decide if you should stay or leave.
I hope that you are not correct that this "probably ... does occur on a regular basis." People who abuse their places of power with children are hopefully few and far between.
I also hope that you don't really believe that some of these situations are "the fault of parents..." There is never any excuse for a coach, teacher, scout leader, priest or anyone else to whom we give access to our children, to abuse them.
I do not know anything about the team where your son swims. I assume, because of its name, that it is in some way associated with Rick Curl. After reading the news stories and the Settlement Agreement with the pro forma complaint attached, it seems likely that USA Swimming will take some type of action so I think you should weigh weigh how those disruptions would affect the team and in particular your son, when you decide if you should stay or leave.
Perhaps I didn't explain myself well. It goes without saying that the perpetrating coach, teacher, etc. is primarily at fault. HOWEVER, I'm not sure if you read the recent story about a 4 year-old boy who shot himself in the head with the gun his step-dad left in the back seat of his unlocked car. There are guns out there, and there are child molesters our there. You take precautions with your children. I would NEVER let my 13 year-old daughter go on a trip alone with a male coach as her caretaker. That is plain stupid. Nor would I let my 16-17 year-old kid leave the pool with his/her coach, or for that matter go out without knowing her whereabouts. I'm pretty sure these coaches pick the low hanging fruit.
reachforthewall.com/.../.
I wouldn't be surprised if other allegations are made ...
It sure is disgusting. The idea that they paid off this family to keep their mouth shut is pretty disturbing. It's hard to imagine Rick Curl (and the Davies family) were the only ones that knew about this. Just seems a little too close to the Penn State affair for my taste. The whole thing is just yucky.
You know, one of the things that really upset some of the parents is that one of the coaches went into a diatribe (when asked) about the allegations, saying how Rick Curl is an outstanding citizen, etc. I think a more measured response should be given by all associated with CUBU. The fact is, nobody really knows anyone solely by their public face. I've seen men who look like the nicest guys in the world turn out to be spouse abusers. Joe Paterno was worshipped by many of his players, but we know how that went. While I cannot say with 100% certainty that Rick Curl is guilty, whatever outstanding citizenship he has displayed means nothing in his defense. If someone falsely accused me of inappropriate behavior with a kid, no way on earth I would do anything but fight it. The truth usually comes out. That payoff is indefensible.
If you are comfortable with your children's coach(es) and your children enjoy swimming for that person, don't change teams.
CUBU is a large,large team. The actions of one or two coaches of that team should not be used to judge the rest of the coaches.
All companies, large or small, there is the chance that a representative of that company will commit an unlawful act(s). That doesn't mean the rest of the company is bad or other people associated with the company. CUBU is no different.
i swam in that area in the 90's during middle and high school, there are plenty of really good teams to choose from if you decide to jump ship (not for this specific team though).
on another note - i really hate how the public jumps absolute decisions. for example, i went to see batman the other week and i can't begin to tell you how many people were surprised i would go see the movie because they think a gunman is going to magically appear at a theater in indiana.
this same logic is being applied to bad coaches. just because 1 or 2 people take part in inappropriate behavior - that now most or all of the coaches do to. curl burke employes hundreds of coaches and assistants, i hope that your wife doesn't let a few bad apples spoil it, they are good people.:badday:
