I'm sure you guys can help... I am a masters swimmer. Our son is 17, has been a club swimmer for four years, and swims on his high school team. He swims with the senior 1 group, and his practices are 2 hours 45 minutes on the weekdays and two hours on Saturdays. He is a decent, solid swimmer (state but not sectional cuts in numerous events). He is a junior in high school and is currently taking five AP courses (his decision, not my husband's and mine). His grades are good and he works hard.
Recently, he has been feeling a lot of stress due to his workload in school and swimming. He told me last night that swimming isn't fun any more. He says he thinks he still wants to swim club, possibly at the senior 2 level instead, and still wants to swim high school. He actually isn't sure he even wants to drop to a less demanding group; he isn't really sure what to do. While I think his academic load is part of why he is stressed, I know that constantly staring at a black line for hours is playing a large part as well. Aside from being supportive of him and encouraging him to talk to his coach (who is my coach as well, which could possibly complicate things), is there anything I can do to help? I don't want to be one of "those" parents, but I want to do what is best for my son. Obviously I would like him to stay in the senior 1 group, but I'm not the one swimming there. His coach knows him well, as he has been with this coach for four years. Part of the issue is that our son doesn't want to let his coach down. I know it is his call, and I'm trying to stay as objective as possible.
I'm sure many of you experienced swim burnout as a teenager. Any suggestions you can give are much appreciated.
Kristin
Parents
Former Member
It would not surprise me if your son was feeling a lot less pressure and a lot less 'burned out' (for the time being anyway) just from hearing such understanding and encouragement from you and his coach. I believe lots of over-achievers perceive pressure from their parents, teachers, coaches, even if there isn't any. That can be why they make choices such as taking 5 AP classes, moving up to the senior group, etc. I know I felt that way as a kid, and I recognize it in my daughter. So, I make it a point to bring up the issues of pressure and stress with her and reiterate my support for whatever she is doing (as long as she's making good choices).
And I think a previous poster might have had a good idea. If you encouraged your son to quit swimming at least until the New Year, he might be really surprised. His reaction may be something like, "I know you never pressure me to work hard, but I could quit? Really? And you wouldn't be disappointed in me?" That alone might enable him to view his swimming in another light. Not as another challenge to be conquered, but as the sport he once chose because he actually like it.
Good Luck!
It would not surprise me if your son was feeling a lot less pressure and a lot less 'burned out' (for the time being anyway) just from hearing such understanding and encouragement from you and his coach. I believe lots of over-achievers perceive pressure from their parents, teachers, coaches, even if there isn't any. That can be why they make choices such as taking 5 AP classes, moving up to the senior group, etc. I know I felt that way as a kid, and I recognize it in my daughter. So, I make it a point to bring up the issues of pressure and stress with her and reiterate my support for whatever she is doing (as long as she's making good choices).
And I think a previous poster might have had a good idea. If you encouraged your son to quit swimming at least until the New Year, he might be really surprised. His reaction may be something like, "I know you never pressure me to work hard, but I could quit? Really? And you wouldn't be disappointed in me?" That alone might enable him to view his swimming in another light. Not as another challenge to be conquered, but as the sport he once chose because he actually like it.
Good Luck!
