I'm sure you guys can help... I am a masters swimmer. Our son is 17, has been a club swimmer for four years, and swims on his high school team. He swims with the senior 1 group, and his practices are 2 hours 45 minutes on the weekdays and two hours on Saturdays. He is a decent, solid swimmer (state but not sectional cuts in numerous events). He is a junior in high school and is currently taking five AP courses (his decision, not my husband's and mine). His grades are good and he works hard.
Recently, he has been feeling a lot of stress due to his workload in school and swimming. He told me last night that swimming isn't fun any more. He says he thinks he still wants to swim club, possibly at the senior 2 level instead, and still wants to swim high school. He actually isn't sure he even wants to drop to a less demanding group; he isn't really sure what to do. While I think his academic load is part of why he is stressed, I know that constantly staring at a black line for hours is playing a large part as well. Aside from being supportive of him and encouraging him to talk to his coach (who is my coach as well, which could possibly complicate things), is there anything I can do to help? I don't want to be one of "those" parents, but I want to do what is best for my son. Obviously I would like him to stay in the senior 1 group, but I'm not the one swimming there. His coach knows him well, as he has been with this coach for four years. Part of the issue is that our son doesn't want to let his coach down. I know it is his call, and I'm trying to stay as objective as possible.
I'm sure many of you experienced swim burnout as a teenager. Any suggestions you can give are much appreciated.
Kristin
He is a decent swimmer, but definitely a better student. He will get into college based on his academics with swimming as an extracurricular activity.
I can relate very well to your son's experience. I also worked very hard in swimming as a teen (with someone you know, I think), but was never better than "best of the rest." I could have swum at my strongly academic college, and I often wonder how my life would have been different if I had. But I could see that I was never going to be an Olympian or even a scholarship athlete, and I was tired of working so hard and so many hours at something that I did not excel at, and I wanted the chance to try some other activities that I could either be better at or be mediocre with less work. So I dropped swimming at 16 and picked it up again at 27.
We've tried to explain the principles of athletic motivation to our kids, but they still seem to have somewhat unrealistic expectations.
I think the unrealistic expectations are realistic for his age, though. At my age, good health and the opportunity to socialize through sports are so valuable that I can enjoy swimming regardless of each season's achievements. At his age, when he can take good health and socializing for granted, he probably looks around him and thinks quite reasonably, "why am I working so hard to be average?" Especially if he is good at school, and is an academic superstar through the perfect combination of hard work and talent, the comparison with swimming is probably very powerful in his head. Later in life, though, he'll realize that swimming taught him some very useful skills, including how to enjoy exercise and how to persevere and improve even at something that does not start out easy.
As long as he continues to do something for recreation and fitness, it doesn't seem as if you and he can make a wrong decision.
He is a decent swimmer, but definitely a better student. He will get into college based on his academics with swimming as an extracurricular activity.
I can relate very well to your son's experience. I also worked very hard in swimming as a teen (with someone you know, I think), but was never better than "best of the rest." I could have swum at my strongly academic college, and I often wonder how my life would have been different if I had. But I could see that I was never going to be an Olympian or even a scholarship athlete, and I was tired of working so hard and so many hours at something that I did not excel at, and I wanted the chance to try some other activities that I could either be better at or be mediocre with less work. So I dropped swimming at 16 and picked it up again at 27.
We've tried to explain the principles of athletic motivation to our kids, but they still seem to have somewhat unrealistic expectations.
I think the unrealistic expectations are realistic for his age, though. At my age, good health and the opportunity to socialize through sports are so valuable that I can enjoy swimming regardless of each season's achievements. At his age, when he can take good health and socializing for granted, he probably looks around him and thinks quite reasonably, "why am I working so hard to be average?" Especially if he is good at school, and is an academic superstar through the perfect combination of hard work and talent, the comparison with swimming is probably very powerful in his head. Later in life, though, he'll realize that swimming taught him some very useful skills, including how to enjoy exercise and how to persevere and improve even at something that does not start out easy.
As long as he continues to do something for recreation and fitness, it doesn't seem as if you and he can make a wrong decision.
