Please share your Tech Suit Eulogies here. It's just a matter of time before they're gone for good.
Morn the passing,
celebrate the life.
Remember the moments.
Share your stories, anecdotes.
Personify your suit.
Tech Suit you were so good to me. You helped me keep it together when I was falling apart (at the end of my races) Despite the rips & wardrobe malfunctions we had some pretty good times together and it's sad to think you're really gonna split. I hope the powers that be won't take you from me, but if they do, I'll miss you and the slick floaty feeling you gave me when we swam together as one.
Former Member
I wear the TYR Aquapel which the material would have passed the FINA standards but it has a zipper so it fails. I have 3 of them and 1 is still in the bag, one was worn once and the other is well worn out.
FINA, blows! - Don't worry, it's a just temporary exile till Speedo can figure out how to game their suit back in as the de facto uniform of all FINA related swimming events.
Lovin' the photo of presumably you underwater!
since this thread has inspired some haikus I figured I would get in on the action with a slightly more epic poem that even rhymes occasionally... It's full of conspiracy theory, butt cracks and thinly veiled FINA bashing... I think you'll like it :)
When Speedo launched the LZR everyone thought it was spectacular,
Times were fast and men's swimming was much less butt-crack-ular.
This was the future of swimming! Sponsored coaches wanted you knowing,
smiling on tv, their paid faces glowing
Swimming was popular with all... which was kind of a first,
Maybe it was because a swimmer could look like a super hero instead of a buff European tourist?
But when new faster suits came out, all of a sudden they became a complete "travesty,"
Tech suits were evil and cheating and needed to be banned most rapidly!
Some people were happy and some were aghast,
but everyone noticed when Ricky's Jaked split right down his ass.
FINA flipped and they flopped while they changed their minds weekly,
They decided to overreact instead of making small changes discreetly.
"No more tech suits! Who would allow such a thing?
Go buy some jammers and meet us back around 1993!"
When FINA was asked, "what about the original decision to make our tech suits legal?"
They said "dude, didn't you know... FINA stands for :censor: It, Not Applicable?"
Ode to a Blueseventy
Blueseventy was the tech suit for me,
It was really great except when I had to pee.
Getting it on was quite the ordeal,
But once in the water, I'd swim like a seal.
The price of course was a little rough,
But it was better than swimming in the buff.
After a swim I'd dry it on the clothes line,
When my wife saw me in it, she said I looked so fine.
Soon it will be gone but I don't know when,
And with it any possibility of making Top Ten.
FINA made a decision that was really bad,
Now my Blueseventy sits in the drawer alone and sad.:badday:
(With apologies to A. E. Housman)
To a Nero Comp banned too soon
The time you won your team the race
We'd bought you at the market-place;
Man and boy stood cheering by,
And home we brought you nice and dry.
Smart suit, to slip betimes away
From pools where glory does not stay,
And early though the laurel grows
It withers quicker than the rose.
Now you will not swell the rout
Of lads that wore their tech suits out,
Swimmers whom renown outswam
And the name died before the man.
So set, before their echoes fade,
The medals on the sill of shade,
And hold to the low lintel up
That rubber suit all zippered up.
These are good. I guess I should take the new one out of the bag, just once and wear it in practice.
Ah FINA had to mess
With the tech suits for the rest
But for me, the big dipper
They took away my zipper
I wear the TYR Aquapel which the material would have passed the FINA standards but it has a zipper so it fails. I have 3 of them and 1 is still in the bag, one was worn once and the other is well worn out.
Did you hear about the old masters swimmer
who wanted to look a lot slimmer?
Bought an undersized fastskin
and crammed himself therein.
As he bent for the start,
the seam ripped apart,
and out popped his crack. What a bummer!
