Here is a question for the lawyers out there.
Do FINA regulations supersede US federal anti-sex discrimination laws?
Granted, I am not sure I know what the latter are. However, if I were to show up at a USMS swimming meet, wearing a perfectly legal women's swimming suit, one of the zipper-free kneeskin type models that also covered my ample boobage, and the officials rightly disqualified me for wearing this get-up because it is against the FINA/USMS agreed upon New Order, could I then turn around and sue under some federal statute prohibiting discrimination because gender?
In my mind, the new FINA rules are going to end up making swimming even more of a dying sport for boys in the US than the unintended consequences of Title IX, etc. Girls, especially in the younger age groups, can often beat boys in swimming, and in fact our own Mr. Qbrain got a top 10 time in the men's 30-34 LCM 1500 this summer. His wife, if I am remembering correctly, beat his time but failed to make the top 10 in the women's category.
If anything, it is we men who are now at a disadvantage. I say make the dystaff gender wear thongs and let us wear body suits fashioned to look like very streamlined tuxedos.
Suits for women now remain pretty much unchanged by the new FINA ruling, with the exception, that is, of getting rid of zippers and getting rid of non textiles. But that means women can continue to swim in what are still arguably very fast suits--FS1's, for example, that are very close to the short john types that helped loads of people get their best times. Men are prohibited from wearing anything but jammers.
Chicks, in other words, get 2004 technology; guys are back to the 60s. Why not let us go back to the 20s instead, when Johnny Weismuller wore a full body suit, albeit of wool?
So, in the spirit of Larry David, who recently concluded an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm with the line, "I'm Larry David, and I am comfortable in women's underwear"--I propose that any men who want to join me in the latest civil rights battle of our time show up at nationals this summer in women's suits and accompanied by our class action lawyer, and join me in echoing in a collective voice that rings out in natatoriums all across the fruited plain:
"I am a male USMS swimmer, and I am comfortable wearing women's suits."
Provided I can find an esquire who will agree to take the case on a contingency basis, I say this to the USMS sexist powers that be:
See you in court! Suckers!
Seems like it's six of one, half dozen of another. Except that jammers are easier to put on, hence my preference for the current standard.
In the long run, you are probably right about this. However, I am not sure when you resumed masters swimming. If it has been within the past year or so, chances are you haven't racked up a bunch of times with various speed suits.
I have been competing semi-regularly in USMS type meets since around the time I turned 49, which was 8 years ago. Most--no, all--of my personal best times since then have been done with different speed suits, from the Aquablade short john (like Allen, I got a woman's suit originally because the men's suits weren't available in the US at first, and frankly, the difference between men's and women's was negligible anyhow) to more recently a used B70.
It's probably obsessive, but I've kept track of my best times in various events each year. I have, therefore, a bunch of personal data "standards" I have set for myself--not really to compare myself with others, but just to compare myself with me.
When the switch is mandated back to the jammers, I am certain my times are going to get worse. They have been steadily getting a little worse because of age anyhow, and though I realize this is perhaps inevitable, there was something nice about being able to fool myself just a wee bit into thinking the Grim Reaper was really dawdling in his onrush in my direction.
In a year or two, when the new "normal" gets re-established, I probably won't give much of a whup about the suit change, and I might even be grateful for not having to pay much for suits ever again.
Still, when you are used to being able to hit a certain mark in your big yearly meet--for me, this has been in the 52s for the 100 and the 1:56's in the 200 free--and all of a sudden you can't come close to such times again, even though you know it's the suit change that's making the difference, there is a little bit of disappointment that you can no longer indulge this harmless self-delusion.
So much of modern life, you just have to grin and bear the world's harsh judgment. I shall miss the suits and the little illusion of relative grandeur they have provided me. Basically, that's what it boils down to: a little white lie lost, one that did no one much harm, but let me feel while it lasted faster in the water than I had any right to be.
Seems like it's six of one, half dozen of another. Except that jammers are easier to put on, hence my preference for the current standard.
In the long run, you are probably right about this. However, I am not sure when you resumed masters swimming. If it has been within the past year or so, chances are you haven't racked up a bunch of times with various speed suits.
I have been competing semi-regularly in USMS type meets since around the time I turned 49, which was 8 years ago. Most--no, all--of my personal best times since then have been done with different speed suits, from the Aquablade short john (like Allen, I got a woman's suit originally because the men's suits weren't available in the US at first, and frankly, the difference between men's and women's was negligible anyhow) to more recently a used B70.
It's probably obsessive, but I've kept track of my best times in various events each year. I have, therefore, a bunch of personal data "standards" I have set for myself--not really to compare myself with others, but just to compare myself with me.
When the switch is mandated back to the jammers, I am certain my times are going to get worse. They have been steadily getting a little worse because of age anyhow, and though I realize this is perhaps inevitable, there was something nice about being able to fool myself just a wee bit into thinking the Grim Reaper was really dawdling in his onrush in my direction.
In a year or two, when the new "normal" gets re-established, I probably won't give much of a whup about the suit change, and I might even be grateful for not having to pay much for suits ever again.
Still, when you are used to being able to hit a certain mark in your big yearly meet--for me, this has been in the 52s for the 100 and the 1:56's in the 200 free--and all of a sudden you can't come close to such times again, even though you know it's the suit change that's making the difference, there is a little bit of disappointment that you can no longer indulge this harmless self-delusion.
So much of modern life, you just have to grin and bear the world's harsh judgment. I shall miss the suits and the little illusion of relative grandeur they have provided me. Basically, that's what it boils down to: a little white lie lost, one that did no one much harm, but let me feel while it lasted faster in the water than I had any right to be.
