Of suits and sexism

Here is a question for the lawyers out there. Do FINA regulations supersede US federal anti-sex discrimination laws? Granted, I am not sure I know what the latter are. However, if I were to show up at a USMS swimming meet, wearing a perfectly legal women's swimming suit, one of the zipper-free kneeskin type models that also covered my ample boobage, and the officials rightly disqualified me for wearing this get-up because it is against the FINA/USMS agreed upon New Order, could I then turn around and sue under some federal statute prohibiting discrimination because gender? In my mind, the new FINA rules are going to end up making swimming even more of a dying sport for boys in the US than the unintended consequences of Title IX, etc. Girls, especially in the younger age groups, can often beat boys in swimming, and in fact our own Mr. Qbrain got a top 10 time in the men's 30-34 LCM 1500 this summer. His wife, if I am remembering correctly, beat his time but failed to make the top 10 in the women's category. If anything, it is we men who are now at a disadvantage. I say make the dystaff gender wear thongs and let us wear body suits fashioned to look like very streamlined tuxedos. Suits for women now remain pretty much unchanged by the new FINA ruling, with the exception, that is, of getting rid of zippers and getting rid of non textiles. But that means women can continue to swim in what are still arguably very fast suits--FS1's, for example, that are very close to the short john types that helped loads of people get their best times. Men are prohibited from wearing anything but jammers. Chicks, in other words, get 2004 technology; guys are back to the 60s. Why not let us go back to the 20s instead, when Johnny Weismuller wore a full body suit, albeit of wool? So, in the spirit of Larry David, who recently concluded an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm with the line, "I'm Larry David, and I am comfortable in women's underwear"--I propose that any men who want to join me in the latest civil rights battle of our time show up at nationals this summer in women's suits and accompanied by our class action lawyer, and join me in echoing in a collective voice that rings out in natatoriums all across the fruited plain: "I am a male USMS swimmer, and I am comfortable wearing women's suits." Provided I can find an esquire who will agree to take the case on a contingency basis, I say this to the USMS sexist powers that be: See you in court! Suckers!
Parents
  • I would agree with you, but I have a more narrow definition of "compete." I mean ranked or scored. Personally, I can't compare my times to a guy or feel like I'm competing against him. Now, if my heart and lungs were the same size as a guy of my weight and height, and if I had the same amount of circulating testosterone, that might be a different story. Ha Ha! What I said was, "many men compare their times to women's times" Everything should be equal like the training we all do - workout is the same for both male & female. I learned long ago that often guys swim slower than girls in workouts relative to their best times. Not sayin all of them... But in masters and age-groupers it is common. I swim with guys all the time - racing in workout sets along side them. But they're always faster at meets. I never wonder why I'm swimming a 58 and they're low 50s but can't hang with me on a set of 200s... it is the way of swim training. They talk about stuff like this at age-group coaches clinics all the time. Watched a group of teenagers today swim a set of 10 X 500. Before #10 and the coach calls out the best time of the set so far - a boy @ 5:18. He had been swimming surrounded by 3 girls all near in time. Final 500, the set record gets broken by a girl, 5:17 and the previous record holder boy gets 4th going 5:22.
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  • I would agree with you, but I have a more narrow definition of "compete." I mean ranked or scored. Personally, I can't compare my times to a guy or feel like I'm competing against him. Now, if my heart and lungs were the same size as a guy of my weight and height, and if I had the same amount of circulating testosterone, that might be a different story. Ha Ha! What I said was, "many men compare their times to women's times" Everything should be equal like the training we all do - workout is the same for both male & female. I learned long ago that often guys swim slower than girls in workouts relative to their best times. Not sayin all of them... But in masters and age-groupers it is common. I swim with guys all the time - racing in workout sets along side them. But they're always faster at meets. I never wonder why I'm swimming a 58 and they're low 50s but can't hang with me on a set of 200s... it is the way of swim training. They talk about stuff like this at age-group coaches clinics all the time. Watched a group of teenagers today swim a set of 10 X 500. Before #10 and the coach calls out the best time of the set so far - a boy @ 5:18. He had been swimming surrounded by 3 girls all near in time. Final 500, the set record gets broken by a girl, 5:17 and the previous record holder boy gets 4th going 5:22.
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