Here is a question for the lawyers out there.
Do FINA regulations supersede US federal anti-sex discrimination laws?
Granted, I am not sure I know what the latter are. However, if I were to show up at a USMS swimming meet, wearing a perfectly legal women's swimming suit, one of the zipper-free kneeskin type models that also covered my ample boobage, and the officials rightly disqualified me for wearing this get-up because it is against the FINA/USMS agreed upon New Order, could I then turn around and sue under some federal statute prohibiting discrimination because gender?
In my mind, the new FINA rules are going to end up making swimming even more of a dying sport for boys in the US than the unintended consequences of Title IX, etc. Girls, especially in the younger age groups, can often beat boys in swimming, and in fact our own Mr. Qbrain got a top 10 time in the men's 30-34 LCM 1500 this summer. His wife, if I am remembering correctly, beat his time but failed to make the top 10 in the women's category.
If anything, it is we men who are now at a disadvantage. I say make the dystaff gender wear thongs and let us wear body suits fashioned to look like very streamlined tuxedos.
Suits for women now remain pretty much unchanged by the new FINA ruling, with the exception, that is, of getting rid of zippers and getting rid of non textiles. But that means women can continue to swim in what are still arguably very fast suits--FS1's, for example, that are very close to the short john types that helped loads of people get their best times. Men are prohibited from wearing anything but jammers.
Chicks, in other words, get 2004 technology; guys are back to the 60s. Why not let us go back to the 20s instead, when Johnny Weismuller wore a full body suit, albeit of wool?
So, in the spirit of Larry David, who recently concluded an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm with the line, "I'm Larry David, and I am comfortable in women's underwear"--I propose that any men who want to join me in the latest civil rights battle of our time show up at nationals this summer in women's suits and accompanied by our class action lawyer, and join me in echoing in a collective voice that rings out in natatoriums all across the fruited plain:
"I am a male USMS swimmer, and I am comfortable wearing women's suits."
Provided I can find an esquire who will agree to take the case on a contingency basis, I say this to the USMS sexist powers that be:
See you in court! Suckers!
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Former Member
Mr. Thornton is a pro at having intelligent fun. He never means to insult anybody!
I will say, however, that he is a little bit hard on the South and the I.Q. level of its population. I believe he must be forgetting that Southerners wrote the Constitution (quite an amazing document that still survives over 200 years later) and dominated all three branches of our government for the first fifty years of our fine country.
While Southerners were busy fighting the Brits in the War of 1812, a bunch of whiney Yankees were talking about seceding from the Union because they weren't getting their way. Only when the U.S. was clearly victorious vis a vis Southerner Andrew Jackson, did the whiney Yankees shut their mouths. When the South got fed up with the North's self-righteous politics in 1860, it took action. Somehow, it took 4 years for the North with 2.5 times the population of the South to overcome brilliant Southern generals. Quite amazing that it took 4 years to overcome the South when the South had not a single cannon factory when the war began. The horrible war lasted so long due to the intelligence of the Southerners involved in battle (and some might say the lack of intelligence on the part of Northern generals). These intelligent men were wrong to be attempting to perpetuate a life, economy, and government based upon slavery. There is absolutely nothing that can justify slavery. These men were wrong, but they were not dumb.
The descendants of those that braved Indian attacks, wrote the Constitution, fought off the Brits in New Orleans, and ran the government in its infancy probably don't look too kindly upon being stereotyped as ignorant Crackers. I suspect, however, that they will forgive Jim for his antics and know that this is all in fun.
Back to the topic of the thread, since men only compete against men and not against women, I do not see how men are disadvantaged.
Jim only insults Southerner's because he doesn't understand our laid back ways. Granted, if Jimbo did move down here, he would be welcomed with homemade ice tea and apple pie.
After Jim had stayed down here for a few months, longing for his frozen lands of PA, we would be happy to wish him a fond farewell with a big county wide party.
Once Jimb was gone, he would be forever known as a "fullback" For ya'll that don't know that affecionate term, it simple is a way of addressing a damn yankee that has moved back to the north. We will greatly help any of the half-backs pack up there mobile homes to become fullbacks.
Mr. Thornton is a pro at having intelligent fun. He never means to insult anybody!
I will say, however, that he is a little bit hard on the South and the I.Q. level of its population. I believe he must be forgetting that Southerners wrote the Constitution (quite an amazing document that still survives over 200 years later) and dominated all three branches of our government for the first fifty years of our fine country.
While Southerners were busy fighting the Brits in the War of 1812, a bunch of whiney Yankees were talking about seceding from the Union because they weren't getting their way. Only when the U.S. was clearly victorious vis a vis Southerner Andrew Jackson, did the whiney Yankees shut their mouths. When the South got fed up with the North's self-righteous politics in 1860, it took action. Somehow, it took 4 years for the North with 2.5 times the population of the South to overcome brilliant Southern generals. Quite amazing that it took 4 years to overcome the South when the South had not a single cannon factory when the war began. The horrible war lasted so long due to the intelligence of the Southerners involved in battle (and some might say the lack of intelligence on the part of Northern generals). These intelligent men were wrong to be attempting to perpetuate a life, economy, and government based upon slavery. There is absolutely nothing that can justify slavery. These men were wrong, but they were not dumb.
The descendants of those that braved Indian attacks, wrote the Constitution, fought off the Brits in New Orleans, and ran the government in its infancy probably don't look too kindly upon being stereotyped as ignorant Crackers. I suspect, however, that they will forgive Jim for his antics and know that this is all in fun.
Back to the topic of the thread, since men only compete against men and not against women, I do not see how men are disadvantaged.
Jim only insults Southerner's because he doesn't understand our laid back ways. Granted, if Jimbo did move down here, he would be welcomed with homemade ice tea and apple pie.
After Jim had stayed down here for a few months, longing for his frozen lands of PA, we would be happy to wish him a fond farewell with a big county wide party.
Once Jimb was gone, he would be forever known as a "fullback" For ya'll that don't know that affecionate term, it simple is a way of addressing a damn yankee that has moved back to the north. We will greatly help any of the half-backs pack up there mobile homes to become fullbacks.
