Triathletes in General

So a lady friend of mine and I were discussing Masters training yesterday, specifically the art of sharing a lane with a mixture of like-minded people not necessarily doing the same work-out (ie: public swimming). Right now all of us are in the same boat; the local indoor Olympic-standard pool has been closed for bi-annual maintenance and we are all having to share a wierd old 50-yard outdoor pool which has long-course lap swimming for only a four hour window each day. Most everyone knows everybody by now, so we are all getting along pretty well. With the exception of the triathletes. So, without trying to poke a sleeping bear with a stick, why is it that tri-athletes cannot seem to get along with competitive swimmers in the training pool? Here are my observations of the group we have here, though they might not be typical examples: 1) Holy smoke are these guys serious about talking about serious training. Note how I worded that. They talk the talk a lot, ignore anything us competitive swimmers might have to say on the subject of training swimming, and generally clog up the end of the pool as they talk. and talk. and talk. Despite the fact they all sport the same middle-aged paunches, they just cannot conceptualize that they are not truly elite athletes and they do not get to set the rules of the pool. 2) They hog the lane. If these guys can drive, how come they cannot figure out circle swimming? It seems to me a pretty simple concept that you stay on your side of that black line on the pool bottom going one way, and then circle to the other side of the line on the way back. That darn line was not painted on the bottom of the pool just so you can swim straight. 3) Circle swimming and trying to mesh the circle swimming of several lanes is just a foreign concept to most of them. It just seems proper that if lane one is circling clockwise, lane two should circle counter-clockwise so you don't bash you freaking arms across the lane lines. The tria-athletes seem to always circle the absolutely wrong way, and with those wide-ass strokes they all seem to use, it is almost inevitable that you will clash. Thankfully most ex-competitive swimmer have developed that 6th sense that tells you to duck when you are about to be smashed (you all know that 6th sense: its called watching where you are going, another apparently foreign concept. Goggles are obviously used for finding floaters at the bottom of the pool rather than looking ahead periodically) 4) Interval training. Tri-athletes seem to believe that is a innovative, modern concept that needs far more study (usually done while they have deep discussions at the end of the pool) before they actually implement it. Serious tri-athletes just know that swimming the same 1000 meter swim with no set pace every single session is a clear formula for winning the next Iron-man. The tri-athletes seem to resent the breaking up of swim sets into reps on intervals, especially if it done by some pathetic competitive swimmer that keeps on passing them while they grind out that standard 1000. 5) Finally, my greatest irritation: X marks the spot!! When you sit at the end of the pool, discussing deeply distressing new concepts such as interval training, circle swimming, and high elbow recovery on the front crawl, why must you sit right in the center of the lane. Did it ever occur to you that the center of the lane has a big cross painted on it and generally Xs and crosses designate landing zones. Of course I know that you rarely use flip turns, but some of us poor simple-minded swimmers do and, from force of habit and in the interest of not smashing into the person behind us, we usually flip-turn on the X. We also tend to come in on one side of the line (that line on the bottom of the pool, put there presumably for some swimmers to find their way back to the discussion at the end of the pool) and leave on the other side. Its called circle swimming. Is there some shortage of information on swim training for tri-athletes? I know that there are all sorts of magazines and books about triathalon; do they all ignore the fact that to succeed at swimming you actually have to follow some sort of structured training program? Do they even touch base on simple pool training etiquette? I used to think that it was just my cross-eyed cussed and curmugeonly ways that found the local tri-athletes to be slightly slow and backward with regards to training-pool etiquette, but my lady-friend was far more cynical than I: she was pretty sure that the tri-athletes purposefully are difficult as part of a competitive strategy.