Here is my story:
I am a 63-year old male who is looking to started swimming instruction. I was very afraid of the water growing up and avoided swimming lessons througout childhood and adolescence, although my two younger siblings learned without trouble. I was the typical shy, glasses-wearing nerd-type, tall and thin, with mostly intellectual interests. I did try several sports when young but didn't do well at any of them. I gave those up by tenth grade and have only walked for exercise since. I had zero water experience exxcept for some summertime wading in lakes.
I didn't learn to swim in high school, since none of the local high schools then required it. I often wonder what I would have done if they had.
After watching the 1972 Olympics, I finally decided to face my fear and, at age 27, enroll in an adult swimming class. Despite a humiliating experience in the first session ("OK, let's everyone swim down to the end of the pool and back.") I persevered and kept coming. That first session I submerged for the first time, simple but very scary. We worked on very basic skills. It took some courage just to open my eyes underwater.
I worked on the basic stuff, but never enjoyed it. There was minimal emphasis on building confidence and relaxation before moving on to stroke mechanics. We were introduced to deep-water adjustment skills, which I was not really ready for. They included descending the ladder to the bottom in the deep end, deep-water entry, and jumping off the diving board. The last two were terrifying. All I could think of was to get back and grab the side as soon as I could.
I never got totally comfortable with my face in the water. Every time I was in a prone in the water I thought of what it was like to drown.
Being in the prone position in the deep was especially scary. I just couldn't do it.
I took swimming classes off and on for about ten years with only modest success. I did learn the elementary back stroke and back crawl, but couldn't do any storkes on the front. I was given a kick board to practice the flutter kick but, despite much trying, couldn't move an inch. Strangely enough, I could kick across the pool, slowly, without using a board.
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Former Member
It is very brave of you to keep trying, and to keep sharing your experience even though some might judge you for it. The first moment that you realize you are in the deep end and aren't afraid will be worth all of this effort.
I have always had a severe fear of deep water - one that kept me out of the deep end until I was 21. I was so tired of missing out that I made the decision to fully face my fear - by seeing a therapist who specialized in phobias. 6 years later, I swim with a masters club 5 times a week and regularly compete in open water. The most amazing moments involve looking around in the middle of a large glistening body of water and reflecting on the fact that I have no idea how deep the water is, and that I'm not afraid.
You can definitely get there. The two most valuable things I learned from the therapist I saw were as follows. First, it is very hard to face a fear if deep down, you think the fear is right. If you think, on any level, that water really is dangerous and that all you want to do is somehow avoid thinking about it, it is going to be very hard to make progress. Try to start thinking of your swimming lessons as a way to remove the dangers of the water, not a way to distract you from them. You can be a strong swimmer, and the deep end of a pool can be a completely safe environment for you. The fear is something you have constructed, and you can deconstruct it.
Second, overcoming a fear is very very difficult. It takes time. Getting frustrated with yourself compounds the negative associations you will have with the water, making progress harder. Instead of getting frustrated that you can't make tremendous progress in one session, be very proud of yourself for each and every small step you can take. Every time you get into the pool, you should be proud of yourself. This process feels hard because it is hard. Keep at it, and you will get there.
Resolving to fully face my fear, and swallowing my pride long enough to find a therapist, was one of the best things I've ever done for myself. I wish you the best of luck in this process.
Don't be frustrated - be proud.
It is very brave of you to keep trying, and to keep sharing your experience even though some might judge you for it. The first moment that you realize you are in the deep end and aren't afraid will be worth all of this effort.
I have always had a severe fear of deep water - one that kept me out of the deep end until I was 21. I was so tired of missing out that I made the decision to fully face my fear - by seeing a therapist who specialized in phobias. 6 years later, I swim with a masters club 5 times a week and regularly compete in open water. The most amazing moments involve looking around in the middle of a large glistening body of water and reflecting on the fact that I have no idea how deep the water is, and that I'm not afraid.
You can definitely get there. The two most valuable things I learned from the therapist I saw were as follows. First, it is very hard to face a fear if deep down, you think the fear is right. If you think, on any level, that water really is dangerous and that all you want to do is somehow avoid thinking about it, it is going to be very hard to make progress. Try to start thinking of your swimming lessons as a way to remove the dangers of the water, not a way to distract you from them. You can be a strong swimmer, and the deep end of a pool can be a completely safe environment for you. The fear is something you have constructed, and you can deconstruct it.
Second, overcoming a fear is very very difficult. It takes time. Getting frustrated with yourself compounds the negative associations you will have with the water, making progress harder. Instead of getting frustrated that you can't make tremendous progress in one session, be very proud of yourself for each and every small step you can take. Every time you get into the pool, you should be proud of yourself. This process feels hard because it is hard. Keep at it, and you will get there.
Resolving to fully face my fear, and swallowing my pride long enough to find a therapist, was one of the best things I've ever done for myself. I wish you the best of luck in this process.
Don't be frustrated - be proud.
