Swimming Stereotypes

Former Member
Former Member
Equipment Rep Trains with every piece of equipment available at all times. The Luddite Trains with nothing. Only uses a loin cloth and goggles in workout. The Barnacle Leaves right on your feet. Couldn't count to five or ten if his life depnded on it. The Coach Not an actual coach, but someone who is consumed with technique. Swimming is a precise set of moves that can be broken down, categorized, and scientifically analyzed. The Jaded Could care less about technique. Just wants to swim and leave the analysis to the eggheads. The Swimaholic Trains at least 10 swimming workouts a week. Anything less is viewed as not trying. Fast Guy who Never Trains Shows up once a month and breaks national records in practice. Hardest Working Man in the Swim Business Trains like a ferocious animal in workout, but has no speed when it comes to racing. Lane Guy Works out in a lane that is far too fast or slow for him. The Crack Guy Dude, pull your swimsuit up or get a bigger size. The Newbie Shows up to practice in board shorts and a scuba mask. _________________ As for myself, I would fall into the categories of Luddite and Jaded. Also, I wrote this from a male perspective, but the women are included as well. Any other stereotypes?
  • Former Member
    Former Member over 13 years ago
    Samson - long-haired man who wears a cap when he swims but does not tuck his long hair into it. It seems like common sense that tucking the hair in would result in faster swimming. But I've never had long hair so I may be missing something here. If his hair is tucked in, does that take away his powers? :drowning::dunno: Then the lady at our pool who wears a speedo cap on her head, but keeps the rest of her hair tied up in a kind of plastic shower cap at the nape of her neck must be Delilah?
  • The guys who wear bulking swim trunks at the pool because "God Forbid" anyone saw them in a jammer or a brief.
  • Or the opposite of Bulking Brief Guy is "String Bikini Girl". This chick shows up at lap swims in a string bikini, unrestrained brazilian blowout hair, and full make-up. She tries to hop in without getting her face wet and proceeds to lap swim doggie paddle style with head up at all times! Her main goal of the swimming workout is to get "in shape" for spring break!!
  • The Conundrum IV - What she's doing looks like flutter kick to me. How, then, does she end up going backwards? She pushes off the wall or the bottom of the pool to get some forward momentum, then kicks and kicks (with a kickboard), slowing down until she eventually starts going in reverse and the cycle repeats. How? Actually... I don't want to know. I'll just keep kicking forwards! :banana: Just flex your feet and keep them flexed while you kick. You too will go backwards.
  • Yes! I've seen that guy :D Often imitated, never duplicated. That wasn't me.
  • Or the opposite of Bulking Brief Guy is "String Bikini Girl". This chick shows up at lap swims in a string bikini, unrestrained brazilian blowout hair, and full make-up. She tries to hop in without getting her face wet and proceeds to lap swim doggie paddle style with head up at all times! Her main goal of the swimming workout is to get "in shape" for spring break!! Yep she was at my pool the other day.
  • Yep she was at my pool the other day. She stopped by my gym a couple years ago. In a thong. :bolt:
  • She stopped by my gym a couple years ago. In a thong. :bolt: The nightmare appears to have been seared into your memory.
  • Former Member
    Former Member over 13 years ago
    Samson - long-haired man who wears a cap when he swims but does not tuck his long hair into it. It seems like common sense that tucking the hair in would result in faster swimming. But I've never had long hair so I may be missing something here. If his hair is tucked in, does that take away his powers? :drowning::dunno: Yes! I've seen that guy :D
  • The nightmare appears to have been seared into your memory. If I replace "nightmare" with then that sentence makes perfect sense! Anyway it's a good thing the pool is only 4.5 feet deep. She was a drowning risk.