Equipment Rep
Trains with every piece of equipment available at all times.
The Luddite
Trains with nothing. Only uses a loin cloth and goggles in workout.
The Barnacle
Leaves right on your feet. Couldn't count to five or ten if his life depnded on it.
The Coach
Not an actual coach, but someone who is consumed with technique. Swimming is a precise set of moves that can be broken down, categorized, and scientifically analyzed.
The Jaded
Could care less about technique. Just wants to swim and leave the analysis to the eggheads.
The Swimaholic
Trains at least 10 swimming workouts a week. Anything less is viewed as not trying.
Fast Guy who Never Trains
Shows up once a month and breaks national records in practice.
Hardest Working Man in the Swim Business
Trains like a ferocious animal in workout, but has no speed when it comes to racing.
Lane Guy
Works out in a lane that is far too fast or slow for him.
The Crack Guy
Dude, pull your swimsuit up or get a bigger size.
The Newbie
Shows up to practice in board shorts and a scuba mask.
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As for myself, I would fall into the categories of Luddite and Jaded. Also, I wrote this from a male perspective, but the women are included as well. Any other stereotypes?
The Voyeur
Watches you very closely throughout the duration of each and every practice. At best you are uncomfortable with this. At worst you are slightly freaked out. You're not sure which is better or worse - that s/he is looking at your technique or er, . . . other things..
Just so you know, if The Voyeur has a Y chromosome and his brain tissues were exposed to a normal level of testosterone during gestation, he is looking at er,.....other things.
There is one theoretical exception to this, but I add theoretical because I am not sure how he could possibly arrange it. To wit, if he somehow managed to be swimming next to you during the refractory period, provided he can keep his eyes opened under the circumstances, he might be temporarily interested in your technique.
You know the refractory period is at an end, however, when he asks if you mind his swimming right behind you to better study the nuances of your *** stroke kick.
I hope this helps.
The Lecherous Explainer
The Voyeur
Watches you very closely throughout the duration of each and every practice. At best you are uncomfortable with this. At worst you are slightly freaked out. You're not sure which is better or worse - that s/he is looking at your technique or er, . . . other things..
Just so you know, if The Voyeur has a Y chromosome and his brain tissues were exposed to a normal level of testosterone during gestation, he is looking at er,.....other things.
There is one theoretical exception to this, but I add theoretical because I am not sure how he could possibly arrange it. To wit, if he somehow managed to be swimming next to you during the refractory period, provided he can keep his eyes opened under the circumstances, he might be temporarily interested in your technique.
You know the refractory period is at an end, however, when he asks if you mind his swimming right behind you to better study the nuances of your *** stroke kick.
I hope this helps.
The Lecherous Explainer
