Equipment Rep
Trains with every piece of equipment available at all times.
The Luddite
Trains with nothing. Only uses a loin cloth and goggles in workout.
The Barnacle
Leaves right on your feet. Couldn't count to five or ten if his life depnded on it.
The Coach
Not an actual coach, but someone who is consumed with technique. Swimming is a precise set of moves that can be broken down, categorized, and scientifically analyzed.
The Jaded
Could care less about technique. Just wants to swim and leave the analysis to the eggheads.
The Swimaholic
Trains at least 10 swimming workouts a week. Anything less is viewed as not trying.
Fast Guy who Never Trains
Shows up once a month and breaks national records in practice.
Hardest Working Man in the Swim Business
Trains like a ferocious animal in workout, but has no speed when it comes to racing.
Lane Guy
Works out in a lane that is far too fast or slow for him.
The Crack Guy
Dude, pull your swimsuit up or get a bigger size.
The Newbie
Shows up to practice in board shorts and a scuba mask.
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As for myself, I would fall into the categories of Luddite and Jaded. Also, I wrote this from a male perspective, but the women are included as well. Any other stereotypes?
Gym swimmer
Gym swimmer swims at your local 3 foot deep, 87+ degree, 26 yard gym pool (not known for it's great facilities.) You always know GS prior to your entering the pool as you can clearly hear the slapping/ beating of the water clear into the women's locker room. GS is visibly upset when you glide right by him despite his efforts to try every toy in his bag (you know that abacus won't be much help) to help give him some extra speed. The first moment you stop to read what's next in your workout, GS mentions that you must compete because usually he beats everyone he's ever seen at this pool - and by a lot. You casually answer, "Oh really?" and then immediately regret saying that you were just warming up. GS typically has some kind of communicable disease always accompanied by a sinus infection and continues to hock up a lung and enough mucus to fill a small mud hut throughout the duration of your workout. Again, during your break, he continues to say how you are annihilating him (didn't realize you were racing?!) and how he is going to swim this illness out. Again, you regret saying that, "It's hard to swim when you are sick" as you take the wall lane in the hopes of only ingesting half a mud hut of mucus. At the end you thank god that you were doing a short Paul Smith workout as GS leaves by saying (is that anger in his voice?), "You're a beast!" and the maintenance guy douses the deck with ammonia and promptly rinses it right into the pool. You are relieved when a supervisor scolds the maintenance guy but it is short lived relief as the reprimand is only for failure to put a yellow "Caution, Wet Surface" sign on the deck.
Gym swimmer
Gym swimmer swims at your local 3 foot deep, 87+ degree, 26 yard gym pool (not known for it's great facilities.) You always know GS prior to your entering the pool as you can clearly hear the slapping/ beating of the water clear into the women's locker room. GS is visibly upset when you glide right by him despite his efforts to try every toy in his bag (you know that abacus won't be much help) to help give him some extra speed. The first moment you stop to read what's next in your workout, GS mentions that you must compete because usually he beats everyone he's ever seen at this pool - and by a lot. You casually answer, "Oh really?" and then immediately regret saying that you were just warming up. GS typically has some kind of communicable disease always accompanied by a sinus infection and continues to hock up a lung and enough mucus to fill a small mud hut throughout the duration of your workout. Again, during your break, he continues to say how you are annihilating him (didn't realize you were racing?!) and how he is going to swim this illness out. Again, you regret saying that, "It's hard to swim when you are sick" as you take the wall lane in the hopes of only ingesting half a mud hut of mucus. At the end you thank god that you were doing a short Paul Smith workout as GS leaves by saying (is that anger in his voice?), "You're a beast!" and the maintenance guy douses the deck with ammonia and promptly rinses it right into the pool. You are relieved when a supervisor scolds the maintenance guy but it is short lived relief as the reprimand is only for failure to put a yellow "Caution, Wet Surface" sign on the deck.
