I am just back from the SPMA meet where all the top finisher were wearing the latest generation tech suits,mostly B-70s(or were named Jeff Commings.)I have here to for been in favor of the suits,but now I am not so sure.First,they eliminate the old bench marks.I went my fastest 100m BR in 5 yr in my LZR,but it was only .3 sec faster than I did untapered 5 wk earlier in my first swim in the LZR.So was my swim good or not,I'm not sure.Also,instead of focusing on technique or pace I found myself ruminating over aspects of the suits,how many more swims did the suit have,is it the right size,was the reason I didn't get better results from my B-70 because it was too big?etc.The B-70 has somewhat mitigated the "too expensive,not durable" problem,but for how long.
Lets say a company comes up with a suit that is much faster,say 4 sec/100.Further that it is very expensive(say $1000) lasts 4 swims and is very hard to make so that quantities are always limited and the fastest way to get one is to bid up to $3000 on ebay. Now lets say your nemesis has one,or that getting one is your best chance to get TT or AA or a ZR or WR,or that your child is close to making JO cuts,or finally beating his/her nemesis etc. Is it worth it and where does it stop?
Jeff, I can see your point.
However, what about what might be called the "Scissors Effect"?
One of the very, very few swimming advantages I have is baldness.
I also have an appendage that is extraordinarily reactive to cold water and the shrinkage factor.
Then we have, on the other blocks, hirsute fellows like yourself, gifted with (what I can only assume from the female smiles you leave in your wake) the kind of apparatus that would make adult industry stars jealous.
I think you will agree that wearing any kind of binding suit whatsoever, such as a conventional Speedo brief, gives you stallion-like fellows an unnatural advantage in the water. Moreover, if you were forced to swim completely swim-cap-less and au naturelle, those raven Aztec locks untrimmed for years and pointing towards the heavens like the quills on an enraged porcupine, well--I think you see where I am going with this.
Here is the challenge:
Throw away your scissors, razor, and other shearing apparatus. No hair cuts or shaving for the next four years.
No suits of any sort whatsoever.
A 100 meter freestyle sprint in early 2103. Just the hairball big-gonaded youngster vs. the bald impotent 60 year old.
To give you one advantage, I will personally ask CreamPuff to administer a pre-race massage to loosen any muscles that may be tight at the humiliating prospect of losing to an old wreck. CreamPuff: spare no warming unguents! I insist!
This will settle the question once and for all. And the footage of such a completely natural state of swimming competition, unaided by any form of technology or even, for that matter, modicum of decency, might actually even help drive viewers to my five-star rated VLOG!
forums.usms.org/blog.php
PS The loser gets to race CreamPuff under similar conditions.
I was about to poke out my mind's eye in an effort to eradicate the image seared into it by Jim's challenge. But then I realized that by 2103, which is after all roughly 94 years from now, depending I suppose on Jim's meaning in specifying "early" 2103, you would both be skinless skeletal remains (or ashes, if cremation is your wont) with your organs (both male and those shared with the fairer sex as well (I suppose it's possible that one or even, although it seems most unlikely, both of you, could say that you have on occasion shared some organ of yours with the fairer sex, but that's not what I meant)) shriveled and dessicated beyond recognition. And I felt better.
Jeff, I can see your point.
However, what about what might be called the "Scissors Effect"?
One of the very, very few swimming advantages I have is baldness.
I also have an appendage that is extraordinarily reactive to cold water and the shrinkage factor.
Then we have, on the other blocks, hirsute fellows like yourself, gifted with (what I can only assume from the female smiles you leave in your wake) the kind of apparatus that would make adult industry stars jealous.
I think you will agree that wearing any kind of binding suit whatsoever, such as a conventional Speedo brief, gives you stallion-like fellows an unnatural advantage in the water. Moreover, if you were forced to swim completely swim-cap-less and au naturelle, those raven Aztec locks untrimmed for years and pointing towards the heavens like the quills on an enraged porcupine, well--I think you see where I am going with this.
Here is the challenge:
Throw away your scissors, razor, and other shearing apparatus. No hair cuts or shaving for the next four years.
No suits of any sort whatsoever.
A 100 meter freestyle sprint in early 2103. Just the hairball big-gonaded youngster vs. the bald impotent 60 year old.
To give you one advantage, I will personally ask CreamPuff to administer a pre-race massage to loosen any muscles that may be tight at the humiliating prospect of losing to an old wreck. CreamPuff: spare no warming unguents! I insist!
This will settle the question once and for all. And the footage of such a completely natural state of swimming competition, unaided by any form of technology or even, for that matter, modicum of decency, might actually even help drive viewers to my five-star rated VLOG!
forums.usms.org/blog.php
PS The loser gets to race CreamPuff under similar conditions.
I was about to poke out my mind's eye in an effort to eradicate the image seared into it by Jim's challenge. But then I realized that by 2103, which is after all roughly 94 years from now, depending I suppose on Jim's meaning in specifying "early" 2103, you would both be skinless skeletal remains (or ashes, if cremation is your wont) with your organs (both male and those shared with the fairer sex as well (I suppose it's possible that one or even, although it seems most unlikely, both of you, could say that you have on occasion shared some organ of yours with the fairer sex, but that's not what I meant)) shriveled and dessicated beyond recognition. And I felt better.
