I am just back from the SPMA meet where all the top finisher were wearing the latest generation tech suits,mostly B-70s(or were named Jeff Commings.)I have here to for been in favor of the suits,but now I am not so sure.First,they eliminate the old bench marks.I went my fastest 100m BR in 5 yr in my LZR,but it was only .3 sec faster than I did untapered 5 wk earlier in my first swim in the LZR.So was my swim good or not,I'm not sure.Also,instead of focusing on technique or pace I found myself ruminating over aspects of the suits,how many more swims did the suit have,is it the right size,was the reason I didn't get better results from my B-70 because it was too big?etc.The B-70 has somewhat mitigated the "too expensive,not durable" problem,but for how long.
Lets say a company comes up with a suit that is much faster,say 4 sec/100.Further that it is very expensive(say $1000) lasts 4 swims and is very hard to make so that quantities are always limited and the fastest way to get one is to bid up to $3000 on ebay. Now lets say your nemesis has one,or that getting one is your best chance to get TT or AA or a ZR or WR,or that your child is close to making JO cuts,or finally beating his/her nemesis etc. Is it worth it and where does it stop?
Jeff, I can see your point.
However, what about what might be called the "Scissors Effect"?
One of the very, very few swimming advantages I have is baldness.
I also have an appendage that is extraordinarily reactive to cold water and the shrinkage factor.
Then we have, on the other blocks, hirsute fellows like yourself, gifted with (what I can only assume from the female smiles you leave in your wake) the kind of apparatus that would make adult industry stars jealous.
I think you will agree that wearing any kind of binding suit whatsoever, such as a conventional Speedo brief, gives you stallion-like fellows an unnatural advantage in the water. Moreover, if you were forced to swim completely swim-cap-less and au naturelle, those raven Aztec locks untrimmed for years and pointing towards the heavens like the quills on an enraged porcupine, well--I think you see where I am going with this.
Here is the challenge:
Throw away your scissors, razor, and other shearing apparatus. No hair cuts or shaving for the next four years.
No suits of any sort whatsoever.
A 100 meter freestyle sprint in early 2103. Just the hairball big-gonaded youngster vs. the bald impotent 60 year old.
To give you one advantage, I will personally ask CreamPuff to administer a pre-race massage to loosen any muscles that may be tight at the humiliating prospect of losing to an old wreck. CreamPuff: spare no warming unguents! I insist!
This will settle the question once and for all. And the footage of such a completely natural state of swimming competition, unaided by any form of technology or even, for that matter, modicum of decency, might actually even help drive viewers to my five-star rated VLOG!
forums.usms.org/blog.php
PS The loser gets to race CreamPuff under similar conditions.
Jeff, I can see your point.
However, what about what might be called the "Scissors Effect"?
One of the very, very few swimming advantages I have is baldness.
I also have an appendage that is extraordinarily reactive to cold water and the shrinkage factor.
Then we have, on the other blocks, hirsute fellows like yourself, gifted with (what I can only assume from the female smiles you leave in your wake) the kind of apparatus that would make adult industry stars jealous.
I think you will agree that wearing any kind of binding suit whatsoever, such as a conventional Speedo brief, gives you stallion-like fellows an unnatural advantage in the water. Moreover, if you were forced to swim completely swim-cap-less and au naturelle, those raven Aztec locks untrimmed for years and pointing towards the heavens like the quills on an enraged porcupine, well--I think you see where I am going with this.
Here is the challenge:
Throw away your scissors, razor, and other shearing apparatus. No hair cuts or shaving for the next four years.
No suits of any sort whatsoever.
A 100 meter freestyle sprint in early 2103. Just the hairball big-gonaded youngster vs. the bald impotent 60 year old.
To give you one advantage, I will personally ask CreamPuff to administer a pre-race massage to loosen any muscles that may be tight at the humiliating prospect of losing to an old wreck. CreamPuff: spare no warming unguents! I insist!
This will settle the question once and for all. And the footage of such a completely natural state of swimming competition, unaided by any form of technology or even, for that matter, modicum of decency, might actually even help drive viewers to my five-star rated VLOG!
forums.usms.org/blog.php
PS The loser gets to race CreamPuff under similar conditions.
