My demented editor (I know he doesn't swim, but I can only hope he isn't a closet masters swim forum lurker) has recently proposed sending me to Afghanistan, which I can't even spell, in order to do a story not on the resurgent Taliban or even the ups and downs of the opium trade, but rather on the enduring popularity of male body building in that ruined country. Supposedly, despite all the troubles over there, muscle gyms abound in Kabul--testimony, in my editor's eyes, at least, to the ineradicability of male vanity.
Why he wants me to write about this is a more complicated story, but I replied that I thought his essential premise was flawed--that men don't body build out of vanity/desire to impress the distaff gender; they do it (in my opinion--must check with evolutionary psychologists for verification; the attached poll is a way of gauging feminine sentiment regarding hypermuscularity) to keep other guys from beating them up. The largest per capita rate of male body building in the US goes is in prisons in states where the respective state legislatures have not banned barbells (hoping to prevent super criminals from being released en masse upon the flabby public when their sentences are over.) My editor was undeterred by my theories and objections--he still wants me to go.
For a variety of reasons, including a probable State Department ban on tourism to countries we're at war with (again, more research needed), I doubt I will actually be going to Afghanistan. But in the remote case I do go, does anyone know places to swim over there?
If I am to be the first "journalist" beheaded during the Global War on Terror, not for investigating this, to be sure, but while reporting on muscle gyms, I would like to at least be able to get some final relaxing laps in before losing my head.
PS if anyone is interested in coming along as a personal masseuse on this junket, let me know your measurements for the prerequisite burka (I think Amanda Beard might model these on the Speedo web site, but I'm not sure.) I'm thinking a good neck rub might serve to relax the cervical muscles, eliminating any knots that might otherwise impede the scimitar's progress, making my moment of dispatch as speedy and pleasant as possible
In this way, I--and not my demented editor--will get the last, albeit very short-lived, laugh!
Former Member
It never ceases to amaze me how easily people are offended, or if they aren't, they are just waiting for an opportunity to scold another. I'm of the opinion that if I am ever offended again, I will PM that person, not show the world my ugly side.
I personally think that SlowSwim's comments were the most useful here because they were based on actual experience, not just personal opinion. Matt, I never would have used any person's name who has met such a horrible end; the comment would have been better served by saying "people".
Hope you don't have to go, Jim. Quite frankly, I can't imagine a target audience for body building in developing countries, let alone a country at war. Take Geraldo with you if you go. And don't swim!!!
donna
I'm happy to continue to discuss my past poor behavior or move forward with the new and improved forum.
Take that, SMITHS!
No, that's too boring. :snore:
I would prefer to torment the Smiths, and perhaps others, as well.
As to "b" words, "Just Say No To Butterfrog."
I guess I was non-tactful. I'm taking huge offense. :rofl: I thought we were all having some fun (although I'm not a huge fan of the "b" word either. Yikes), and now you say we're spiraling out of control. Just when I had sharpened my scimitar ...
Actually I said that I didn't think things had gotten out of control yet....but "if" things begin to spiral out of contrlol then maybe we should ditch the debate / argument. I wasn't pointing any fingers at anyone in particular (as I said). Please don't stab me with that scimitar by the way. I'm afraid of pointy objects like that LOL!
Newmastersswimmer
My sensibilities are a bit frayed.
The other day, my 18-year-old son received his second notice from the Selective Service Administration (I destoyed the first one that skittled like a bubonic rat into our mail box) telling him that he faced prison time if he didn't register for the non-draft. To me, this kind of thing is what's truly offensive.
Jim:
Word to the wise: you son should register. There is no draft, but not registering will destroy his life!
He is 18 (an adult) so your actions will land on him and hard.
Sorry, but it is the law.
Bill
It's stooping a little low to be insulting someone's job.
Actually he referred to himself as a "journalist" (his quotation marks, not mine) in his original post. I thought he was a freelance writer. Daniel Pearl, on the other hand, was a journalist who worked for the Wall Street Journal.
Except Canadians!
:rofl:
And duck-footed gymnasts whose parents made them become breastrokers
Geek...I'm on to you Bro...Evil and I are coming to pay a visit and settle some of this trash talk!
Oh and by the way (on topic), Jim be safe if you make the trip....I would enjoy reading the article....also, as much as it may pain you...thank God that your son and others like him (thanks Slowswim) are able/willing to protect a place I call "home" so that we have the freedoms to come onto forums such as this and piss as many people off as possible!!
PS: (registered as an Independent by the way...in case you wondered)
I'm not pointing my finger at anybody in particular here (b/c otherwise that would make me a major hypocrite)....but just a reminder:
Jim Majystek made it clear after the last thread closing that if you find a posting offensive, then report it to the mods or PM the person about it....BUT do not respond to it on the public forum. I personally think this is a good idea b/c it avoids forum fighting. Everyone seemed to be getting along pretty well for almost a month or so before this minor bump in the road. There is still time to just leave it alone before it escalates.
Also IMO I believe there is a difference between disagreeing with a person's comments and tactifullly pointing that out (and why) in a public response verses a non-tactiful comment that expresses disagreement. Admittedly though there can be a fine line between these two approaches...and it is subject to personal interpretation. So, if things start to spiral out of control...maybe thats a sign to leave the debate alone and post about something else....Just a thought only (so please don't take offense).
Newmastersswimmer
You guys are at it again.
Puffball.
I wouldn't mind being a "journalist" rather than a shark once in awhile.
Now, back to the regularly scheduled bickerfest.
What? Are you insulting my job?
You guys are at it again.
Puffball.
Where have you been these days Caped One? LOL! I swear its been all lovey dovey around here for over a month up until this thread!....Maybe the bad Karma came early today in anticipation of your forthcoming appearance after leaving for so long o.k.! LOL!
Newmastersswimmer
