A quick question for the knowledgeable readers out there. This NYT magazine called Play recently contacted me about writing a piece for a section they call "Master Class" -- they want me to go someplace warm and get some swimming instruction of some sort.
I know that USMS used to have some kind of program where masters swimmers could apply to go out to Colorado Springs for intensive coaching, stroke analysis in the ICAR flume, etc. Is this still going on, do any of you know, and would it be possible to just do a "lite" version of this (a day or two; bypass the application process; not actually need to be an elite swimmer; etc.)
The other possibilities would be one of Terry's TI camps (though, God help me, front quadrant swimming really hurts my shoulders, and I feel this dog is just too old to learn that particular new trick).
Or--and this might be my favorite of all--didn't Gary Hall, Jr. start some sort of Sprint Club training camp down in Key West or the Bahamas or some similar place that would prove the perfect antidote to Pittsburgh this time of the year, especially if I don't have to pay for it?
Please let me know the details of any such possibiities--the editor did specify he'd prefer me to go someplace "warm and outdoors-y." Which makes two of us.
Former Member
gull, who doesn't even post here anymore. QUOTE]
I hope Gull will return to the forum when I declare him the winner of the Geek/Gull Swimoff. This I base on an age related handicap system I am working on to present a fair and balanced (ha ha) challenge to Muppet for Zones.
Darn.....its too late for me to enter medical school now...I should have gone into orthopedics....Note to self: You can't marry a head cheerleader by becoming a Math Geek!!....Uhumm...sorry I was just talking to myself o.k. Us geeks do that from time to time.....carry on now.
Newmastersswimmer
Girls, girls! (Women, women?)
There's room for you all!
The younger one to play video games with me, the older one to give me my bath and help me into my Speedo, and the two together--wielding unguents--to annoint my tired and flagging muscles, administer my various pharmaceutical agents, and bring me back to sort-of-life!
When it comes to manservants, a guy like me can never have too many! I can actually see the two of you swimming right next to me, like healthy dolphins helping their sick and weak elder keep his blowhole above the surface, even as Gary Hall, Jr.--channeling the spirit of grandpa Charles "Lincoln Savings and Loan Scandal" Keating--barks "faster, faster!" in the subtropical background.
Ah--there must be a flock of parrots, too, cackling beneathe a cerulean sky!
This is truly going to be great...
...and you'll need a "quintessential" English butler...I'm cheap...
...and you'll need a "quintessential" English butler...I'm cheap...
posted by that British feller
Watch out Jim. You know the saying....the butler is always the guilty one!....and we already know how "cheap" you are Rich...LOL!!
Newmastersswimmer
I can see it now. In a few weeks we'll read "USMS swimmer disappears at tropical swim camp. Last seen hoisted on the shoulders of bare-breasted indigenes and headed into the dense rainforest, Mr.Thornton was clutching an enormous bottle of rum to his bosom and loudly proclaiming 'I'm the King of the Pool!' ".
I'll weigh in with an elliptical short story that ties in Jim's disappearance to the Bork's galactic conspiracy.
Kyra will write a lilting poem lamenting that nothing interesting like that happens where she lives.
GoodSmith will go off on a rant berating Jim for choosing a foreign swim camp.
Mel will point out that a high altitude camp would have left Jim with no energy for shenanigans.
Frank will post a well-researched history of masters swimmers who disappeared with a smile on their face.
Leslie will launch a class action suit on their behalf.
Heather will be sad until she learned that Jim frequently swam breastroke.
Matt will question the non-swimming related content.
Rich will post a witty limerick laced with double entendre that will
Shut down the thread.
Then Jim's editor will receive an untraceable telegram requesting a two-year extension on his deadline.
I just scanned this thread, but I didn't see the SwimSmooth people listed. They are in warm climes, and I believe cater to Masters as well as the younger folk.
(If a trip to Australia is in your future, I'll be happy to come along and translate. :drink: )
I'm just insulted that Fortress left me out of her version of the aftermath.
Caped swooped in, grabbed Islandsox and helped defeat a skinny clique of indigenes in an open water swim after Monkey La-Las.
Islandsox:
Men are trouble. Whoops, that's a different thread.
