This was in today's "Dear Abby" column in the paper:
DEAR ABBY: I am a 55-year-old female who competes in triathlons for fun, fitness and health. I consulted my doctor because I was having foot pain. When I told him I was a runner and was preparing for a marathon race, his response was, "At your age, you could hardly call it a race."
I was shocked. I repeated the insulting comment to my husband, who has never supported me in this nor attended my races. He replied, "Well, you don't actually consider yourself an athlete, do you?"
I am so offended that I want to dismiss both my doctor and my husband. I just finished a race with 5,000 women. Every one of them was fabulous and serious, no matter how old or what they looked like. It was the spirit of the sport that mattered. At what age does one stop being an athlete? -- OLDER ATHLETE, EUGENE, ORE.
This raised some interesting questions in my mind about support, encouragement, or the lack thereof. I don't want to discuss the "athlete-yes-or-no" question. Instead, I'd like to know how people out there deal with non-supportive spouses, friends, co-workers, doctors, etc.
My own experience includes being teased by my co-workers for "getting beat by a 70-year-old woman." (This was after a big meet where they viewed my results on the Internet.) This came from men who are at least 50 pounds overweight and can barely walk from their cars to their desks.
I don't get why some husbands aren't supportive of their wives swimming.
From the male perspective, the BEST female swimming bodies painted with a well-fitting speedo are worthy of being on a Cosmo magazine cover. Now, it's true that not all female swimming bodies fit this example, but swimming improves ANY female (or male) body. Why any husband wouldn't want to encourage that is beyond my grasp. Visual stimulation is near the top of any male's list of what attracts them to females. This should be a no-brainer for husbands.
My husband is pretty supportive of my swimming -- but he also expects me to be supportive of his athletic addictions. My doctors likewise try to keep me in the water, instead of just telling me to "rest," which I appreciate.
A pet peeve of mine though, and one which I don't hear infrequently, is that men/teenage boys don't like female swimmer bodies. We have broad shoulders, we look like we're on steroids, we're buff, we can beat people up. I would have thought this neanderthalian view would have undergone a transformation in more recents times, with so many former athletes as moms. But, alas, I have heard this out of the mouth of teenage boys.
Fortunately, like the last poster, my husband likes athletic, trim bodies and there are obviously others like him. But it still seems like the "ideal" girl body, or at least what I hear, is thin, thin, thin. Nearly anorexicly thin. I actively discourage this thinking and encourage my girls to be as athletic as possible. But I do worry about society's obsession with thinness ... as opposed to being healthy, lean and fit.
I don't get why some husbands aren't supportive of their wives swimming.
From the male perspective, the BEST female swimming bodies painted with a well-fitting speedo are worthy of being on a Cosmo magazine cover. Now, it's true that not all female swimming bodies fit this example, but swimming improves ANY female (or male) body. Why any husband wouldn't want to encourage that is beyond my grasp. Visual stimulation is near the top of any male's list of what attracts them to females. This should be a no-brainer for husbands.
My husband is pretty supportive of my swimming -- but he also expects me to be supportive of his athletic addictions. My doctors likewise try to keep me in the water, instead of just telling me to "rest," which I appreciate.
A pet peeve of mine though, and one which I don't hear infrequently, is that men/teenage boys don't like female swimmer bodies. We have broad shoulders, we look like we're on steroids, we're buff, we can beat people up. I would have thought this neanderthalian view would have undergone a transformation in more recents times, with so many former athletes as moms. But, alas, I have heard this out of the mouth of teenage boys.
Fortunately, like the last poster, my husband likes athletic, trim bodies and there are obviously others like him. But it still seems like the "ideal" girl body, or at least what I hear, is thin, thin, thin. Nearly anorexicly thin. I actively discourage this thinking and encourage my girls to be as athletic as possible. But I do worry about society's obsession with thinness ... as opposed to being healthy, lean and fit.
