Okay, I know somebody's gonna bust me on the unethical nature of what I'm about to ask. Rest assured I'm not actually planning to do this, but with the misery of swimming in my current pool the idea did enter my head, sort of a "what if" type of thought...
Have any of you find upstanding folks ever used a hotel or apartment pool where you weren't staying or living, um, without permission? I know, most hotel and apartment pools suck, but occasionally there's one that's of sufficient size to get a workout that beckons to you over the fence. "Come swim in me..."
Anybody do this regularly and get away with it? Anybody have any interesting stories of running half naked from hotel security hell bent on having you charged with tresspassing?
Once again, no lectures, please. I've been reading a lot of material from Hunter Thompson lately (who swims, by the way--or at least he used to), and his weird shenanigans have my own imagination coming up with all kinds of daring, if unethical, solutions to the problems of life.
Parents
Former Member
Call around to local hotels to inquire as to size of pool and whether they sell community memberships. (I know of a hotel near me that sells family memberships to its pool for a very modest price, but you must live in that city. (When I used this pool, I did not live in the right city and, thus, had to opt for the walk-in-and-pretend-I-belonged access option.) You might have similar hotels near you. Be sure to ask about parking options for community guest members, other applicable rules (days of week or hour limitations for community guest members), and about crowded times/best times to swim.)
Some hotels allow family members of hotel employees to use pool facilities. If you can find out what hotels near you do this, you might want to avoid these pools during summer months. You will find the stay-at-home parents there with their kids. (My brother used to work at a hotel (nice one), and his wife and their 3 kids were there almost daily during the summer, along with a slew of other parents/kids -- it was the place for the stay at home spouses of hotel staff to hang out with their kids.... They were limited to weekday use and excluded Fridays-Sundays.)
To scope things out in advance, you might just show up at some of your prospective options and ask to see their facilities, as you are planning for some relatives to visit you and will be putting them up at a hotel near your home. Ask to see the pool during your tour....
On Gonzo pool hopping: Avoid dropping acid during the 12 hours preceding your planned swim. The sharks, eels and squids that may greet you at the pool will not be worth the trip. Hotel staff will also become too ominous. Do not brandish weapons on the hotel premises. This makes hotel staff nervous and suspicious. Leave the Tequila, limes and beer at home. While you may feel completely in control of a situation involving hotel staff and security, the situation may turn ugly without warning and you may need to leave the premises promptly. If you are trying to make your escape by car, limes bouncing around in the back seat and a beer in your hand can easily be forgotten until it is too late. Do not drive wildly through the hotel parking lot upon arrival. Attracting attention at this stage may blow your chances of sliding by hotel security without questioning. Park in the hotel parking lot and pay the hotel parking fee. This will make you an authentic paying guest. :) Obey all pool rules (other than the one that says you must be a guest of the hotel to use the pool). Be polite and smile as you pass hotel staff on your way to the pool. Relax, and enjoy the swim!
Call around to local hotels to inquire as to size of pool and whether they sell community memberships. (I know of a hotel near me that sells family memberships to its pool for a very modest price, but you must live in that city. (When I used this pool, I did not live in the right city and, thus, had to opt for the walk-in-and-pretend-I-belonged access option.) You might have similar hotels near you. Be sure to ask about parking options for community guest members, other applicable rules (days of week or hour limitations for community guest members), and about crowded times/best times to swim.)
Some hotels allow family members of hotel employees to use pool facilities. If you can find out what hotels near you do this, you might want to avoid these pools during summer months. You will find the stay-at-home parents there with their kids. (My brother used to work at a hotel (nice one), and his wife and their 3 kids were there almost daily during the summer, along with a slew of other parents/kids -- it was the place for the stay at home spouses of hotel staff to hang out with their kids.... They were limited to weekday use and excluded Fridays-Sundays.)
To scope things out in advance, you might just show up at some of your prospective options and ask to see their facilities, as you are planning for some relatives to visit you and will be putting them up at a hotel near your home. Ask to see the pool during your tour....
On Gonzo pool hopping: Avoid dropping acid during the 12 hours preceding your planned swim. The sharks, eels and squids that may greet you at the pool will not be worth the trip. Hotel staff will also become too ominous. Do not brandish weapons on the hotel premises. This makes hotel staff nervous and suspicious. Leave the Tequila, limes and beer at home. While you may feel completely in control of a situation involving hotel staff and security, the situation may turn ugly without warning and you may need to leave the premises promptly. If you are trying to make your escape by car, limes bouncing around in the back seat and a beer in your hand can easily be forgotten until it is too late. Do not drive wildly through the hotel parking lot upon arrival. Attracting attention at this stage may blow your chances of sliding by hotel security without questioning. Park in the hotel parking lot and pay the hotel parking fee. This will make you an authentic paying guest. :) Obey all pool rules (other than the one that says you must be a guest of the hotel to use the pool). Be polite and smile as you pass hotel staff on your way to the pool. Relax, and enjoy the swim!
