Rare breaststroke problem

Searching everywhere and not finding much, I think I have an unusual breaststroke problem: I struggle to get my head out of the water for breathing, and then it drops down deep, so that on my next stroke I have to stuggle to get my head ... and round and round it goes. Moreover, I read about swimmers having the opposite problem; their heads go too high! And indeed I've seen pictures of breaststrokers with their bodies out of the water down to their waists! I know it's bad form, but wow! I can't even do a head-up breaststroke; my head just won't stay up. Anyone else have/had this problem? Any suggestions? I don't even understand what is supposed to bring the head up; where and when is the upward force being applied and by what? Fighting for breath on every stroke is causing huge anxiety for me; I usually end up with water instead of air in my mouth and I have to abort the swim and have a coughing fit. It's a showstopper. Alan