Here is a question for the lawyers out there.
Do FINA regulations supersede US federal anti-sex discrimination laws?
Granted, I am not sure I know what the latter are. However, if I were to show up at a USMS swimming meet, wearing a perfectly legal women's swimming suit, one of the zipper-free kneeskin type models that also covered my ample boobage, and the officials rightly disqualified me for wearing this get-up because it is against the FINA/USMS agreed upon New Order, could I then turn around and sue under some federal statute prohibiting discrimination because gender?
In my mind, the new FINA rules are going to end up making swimming even more of a dying sport for boys in the US than the unintended consequences of Title IX, etc. Girls, especially in the younger age groups, can often beat boys in swimming, and in fact our own Mr. Qbrain got a top 10 time in the men's 30-34 LCM 1500 this summer. His wife, if I am remembering correctly, beat his time but failed to make the top 10 in the women's category.
If anything, it is we men who are now at a disadvantage. I say make the dystaff gender wear thongs and let us wear body suits fashioned to look like very streamlined tuxedos.
Suits for women now remain pretty much unchanged by the new FINA ruling, with the exception, that is, of getting rid of zippers and getting rid of non textiles. But that means women can continue to swim in what are still arguably very fast suits--FS1's, for example, that are very close to the short john types that helped loads of people get their best times. Men are prohibited from wearing anything but jammers.
Chicks, in other words, get 2004 technology; guys are back to the 60s. Why not let us go back to the 20s instead, when Johnny Weismuller wore a full body suit, albeit of wool?
So, in the spirit of Larry David, who recently concluded an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm with the line, "I'm Larry David, and I am comfortable in women's underwear"--I propose that any men who want to join me in the latest civil rights battle of our time show up at nationals this summer in women's suits and accompanied by our class action lawyer, and join me in echoing in a collective voice that rings out in natatoriums all across the fruited plain:
"I am a male USMS swimmer, and I am comfortable wearing women's suits."
Provided I can find an esquire who will agree to take the case on a contingency basis, I say this to the USMS sexist powers that be:
See you in court! Suckers!
Former Member
I've been trying to convince my boss for years that we should launch a magazine to compete with "People" in the South, called "Folks".
Somebody already beat you to it with an online version called Cracker Magazine.
I have no intention of shaving, btw. Is there any research showing that it actually makes a difference?
Yes.
Here's the proof.
It would be wise to leave the greatest basketball players that ever walked the planet alone.
What were you wearing back then, a diaper?
If someone isn't a Southerner OR a Yankee, what do you Southern folks call them??
"Those people."
Warning: Never say, "You guys" in the South. It is a dead giveaway that you are not from the South. Always say y'all. Always keep in mind the saying, "When in Rome do as the Romans do."
Suggested reading before coming to the South: Y'all Magazine http://www.yall.com/
Is it the shaving thing?
I have no intention of shaving, btw. Is there any research showing that it actually makes a difference?
Answer to your first question...Yes.
Answer to your second question...if you are hairy enough(dough boy...shut your yap before you make a smart comment about my hair)
So, if FINA would allow the short-john suit for men, like USA swimming had orignally intended to purpose, I would prefer one over jammers
It would be wise to leave the greatest basketball players that ever walked the planet alone.
What were you wearing back then, a diaper?
That doesn't look like Michael Jordan
But you aren't just competing against each other, you are competing against the CLOCK.
No, we're not.
Your best effort is your best effort. I mean hell, if you put on a jet pack it would improve your time.
For me, merely shaving seconds is meaningless. Ok, so there may be a suit that could shave some time. So what?
If my best effort in suit A is 27 seconds, and my best effort in suit B is 26 seconds, that's no reason to push for allowing suit B rather than suit A. Because if I can wear suit B, so can everyone else, and they'll get the same boost.
I think FINA is correct to rein in the suit wars.
If the doors are thrown open, then we'll get ourselves into a situation where the elites are given high-tech suits for free, and everyone trying to get into the elite ranks will be compelled to continually purchase new products in order to stay competitive.
ETA: Same for jammers v. short johns.
It's like bovine growth hormone -- a boon for the manufacturers, but an expense to everyone else.
FINA is doing the right thing to draw the line. It puts an end to the nonsense.
And as long as we're all on the same playing field, there's no disadvantage to us, and a distinct advantage in that we don't have to worry about having to pony up for the next innovation.
If we're all in jammers, we're all in jammers.
Want to improve your time? Improve your technique or build your strength.
Reducing your time by any means just to reduce your time is a pointless endeavor, imo.
Yes.
Can you post a link? I'd be interested to see the research, if it's available online. If not, then if you know of a book or a magazine article, please let me know.
Yeah, I'm a research wonk.
So, if FINA would allow the short-john suit for men, like USA swimming had orignally intended to purpose, I would prefer one over jammers
Seems like it's six of one, half dozen of another. Except that jammers are easier to put on, hence my preference for the current standard.
Can you post a link? I'd be interested to see the research, if it's available online. If not, then if you know of a book or a magazine article, please let me know.
Yeah, I'm a research wonk.
Anderson et. al. found a 5% increase in DPS in shaved swimmers (Medicine and Science in Sports and Exercise, 24:1141). Cited in Maglischo's Swimming Fastest.
This comment makes me wonder if you are a halfback at heart?
There ain't no other KIND of ice tea other than 'homemade' at least to southron gentry.
sigh.
There is only ONE FREAKING WAY IN HELL that I ever want to be considered a "half-back" and that is if I am moving back to the south from the north. There is absolutely no way in HELL that I ever want to be mistaken for a damn yankee.
