Greetings all!!
A LONG time ago, I was an age group swimmer. Not all that good, really ... basically I was a 5-6-7 finisher from age 8 through high school. (Thus, no one wanted me for anything more serious!!)
My son, now age 8.5, started swimming on a team this summer and seemed to enjoy it. It was at an outdoor pool and it was a pretty laid back program. This month, we started him in a YMCA program that's considerable more organized. He seems to have a lot of natural talent (for his swimming, baseball, skiing, school work) but no PASSION for anything ... yet.
Now, I know that he's young and I definitely don't want to be a pushy parent, but I do have a question.
For those of you who had success swimming post-high school (college level or nationally), when did that spark of PASSION to really do something special ignite? Was it something your parents did ... or, maybe, did not do? Was it a coach? Happen young? Or late?
I want to encourage him but not pressure him. I had little talent, and thus wasn't able to do all that much athletically. But, he seems to have a LOT of natural talent and I don't want to see him pass up opportunities.
Thanks in advance for any thoughts.
Cheers!!
Ken
but a lot of these kids love swimming and don't want to mess around with other sports. (quite a few have realized that they're not quite cooridinated enough to make the same kind of progress out of the water!)
The real rub is for the natural athlete who excels at swimming, but also excels at other sports. A 13 year old boy on our USA team, nationally ranked as a 12 year old, just quit swimming for other sports. Without the lure of other sports, it's easier to fully dedicate yourself to swimming because it's where you feel most comfortable. For others, it can be a huge sacrifice.
The real rub is for the natural athlete who excels at swimming, but also excels at other sports. A 13 year old boy on our USA team, nationally ranked as a 12 year old, just quit swimming for other sports. Without the lure of other sports, it's easier to fully dedicate yourself to swimming because it's where you feel most comfortable. For others, it can be a huge sacrifice.
You have to remember, though, that being nationally ranked at 12 can be a result of a lot of factors that don't always get recognized. Many kids who are great as age-groupers are just ahead of the curve in growth and coordination. Eventually things even out and they aren't the biggest and strongest anymore. If ever there was an age group where the discrepancy in size was glaring it's the 11-12 boys. Some of them look 8 and others look 15.
You have to remember, though, that being nationally ranked at 12 can be a result of a lot of factors that don't always get recognized. Many kids who are great as age-groupers are just ahead of the curve in growth and coordination. Eventually things even out and they aren't the biggest and strongest anymore. If ever there was an age group where the discrepancy in size was glaring it's the 11-12 boys. Some of them look 8 and others look 15.
I am well aware of this phenomenon. I myself was one of those early maturing nationally ranked 12 years old. I didn't particularly enjoy the very rough transition from tallest to shortest, but I stuck with the sport because I loved it.
The most successful 12 year old boys do look like "men." However, the boy I refered to was, as a 12 year old, small and skinny with the most beautiful flowing strokes ever. He was a natural in the pool.
Nowadays, I see monstrously tall 12 year old girls too. Swimming attracts the tall.
Don't push. Encourage him. Don't let them give up at first challenge either.
Tell him to give his best efforts in the races/game but don't force him to play or race.
Never scream out from the bleachers about mistakes.
Ask if they have fun after the race/game.
Talk about things they can work on doing right after (but only if you know what you're talking about).
End the discussion on a positive note about something they did really well.
And last...Never wear anything remotely embarrassing...
:rofl:
Most kids hate this. I'd leave it to the coaches. On the rare occasion when I try to say something in a constructive way, I get the "look."
You have a teen...the "look" is de rigeur. :D You can still give advice...even if they pull faces...just never lead in with a checklist of what they did wrong.
It also depends on the kid. Lucky for me, mine plays soccer, and she has seen me play, and has asked me to help coach so she knows I understand the game. Usually it's minor things and I try to get her to explain what happened or didn't happen then give my input. My son is just too young at 5 to do anything other than go and run around...though he gave me a detailed play by play of his goal Saturday...
:lmao:
Some pressure can be positive. The point at that age is to have fun but If you tell them to beat the kid next to them and try to get a time, that is encouraging. If they don't win just say nice job that was a good swim even if it was bad. Fortress, you know times at that age definatly matters :agree:, just kidding, but it does matter a little. Also I know times at that age times don't predict the future, I was just curious to see what they were.
Stud: You keep right on giving advice. I'm keeping my trap shut.
Hehe I'm not saying you have to tell her anything, My one even apologised for not listening to me once when I was coaching her team. I can't remember the last thing I said to her about her play anyhow...beyond telling her to give 110%.
She needs a boot up the jacksie to get her going...her coach asked me if I was OK with him pushing her...I told him "He'd get no argument from me...and we tell her to give her all even if it's only 10 minutes and then come off and rest..."
Then there's the offside rule. They explained it, but how many kids will stand up in front of the friends and admit they didn't understand at training? We went through it at home and now she knows--I think. It's very different with teens.
Please don't push! Remember the bigger picture. Your longterm relationship with your child is the most precious thing you have to offer.
Ulimately, it is always their choice and always will be - make sure they feel listened to, supported, encouraged, and connected to you, regardless of performance.
