This was in today's "Dear Abby" column in the paper:
DEAR ABBY: I am a 55-year-old female who competes in triathlons for fun, fitness and health. I consulted my doctor because I was having foot pain. When I told him I was a runner and was preparing for a marathon race, his response was, "At your age, you could hardly call it a race."
I was shocked. I repeated the insulting comment to my husband, who has never supported me in this nor attended my races. He replied, "Well, you don't actually consider yourself an athlete, do you?"
I am so offended that I want to dismiss both my doctor and my husband. I just finished a race with 5,000 women. Every one of them was fabulous and serious, no matter how old or what they looked like. It was the spirit of the sport that mattered. At what age does one stop being an athlete? -- OLDER ATHLETE, EUGENE, ORE.
This raised some interesting questions in my mind about support, encouragement, or the lack thereof. I don't want to discuss the "athlete-yes-or-no" question. Instead, I'd like to know how people out there deal with non-supportive spouses, friends, co-workers, doctors, etc.
My own experience includes being teased by my co-workers for "getting beat by a 70-year-old woman." (This was after a big meet where they viewed my results on the Internet.) This came from men who are at least 50 pounds overweight and can barely walk from their cars to their desks.
Former Member
I'm fortunate that my husband is happy that I'm happy swimming. I'm sure it hasn't hurt that I've dropped a lot of weight and added some muscle tone. Although I'm not too sure he likes the eau de chlorine.
(My mom saw me swimming over the holidays and was so proud of me. I felt like I was 14 again.)
My wife actually buys into this. I get the feeling she thinks if you lift weights you might wake up the next morning and all of a sudden be a gorilla.
A young woman on our team was training for 2006 Olympics a few years ago, and her shoulders got so big from lifting and swimming that she had to stop training so she could fit into her wedding dress...
:banana:
A young woman on our team was training for 2006 Olympics a few years ago, and her shoulders got so big from lifting and swimming that she had to stop training so she could fit into her wedding dress...
:banana:
Should have pushed the Wedding Back....
My wife actually buys into this. I get the feeling she thinks if you lift weights you might wake up the next morning and all of a sudden be a gorilla.
Kirk:
Your wife is not unique. This is a very common way of thinking in my experience. I also agree with FindingMyInnerFish that if the guy is scared off, so much the better. (BTW, ultrarunner bf -- very cool. I have a friend running at night with a flashlight on his head. Wish I could.)
As you know, if you are doing light weights, you will merely get toned and look better. If you are doing some heavier weights, you will get toned, look better and be stronger and more fit. You will increase your metabolism as well. So your wife, if she's not a swimmer, should go for it. If you do light and heavy weights and swim, you will be all those things and maybe bigger in some areas than you previously were (you may decrease in some areas too -- like the hips -- not a problem). At least from my sprinter body perspective/experience. Let's face it, swimmers have broad shoulders. The issue is whether one cares about the possible transformation.
When I quit swimming in college, I lost a ton of weight and shrunk. I wasn't lifting anymore, no broad shoulders, very petite. I attempted to stay that way through the child years, which is difficult as many of us know. I ran mostly and was a cardio junkie. Never really lifted. But when I started swimming and lifting again, egad! My shoulders went crazy. My muscles went crazy. I got pretty buff again. The guys on my team tell me I have "fly arms" and look "strong." (I don't think they mean it in a really derogatory way.) My son once remarked that I look like I'm on steroids (his comparison is skinny middle school girls). I arm wrestled him to humiliation. But the bottom line is I'm toned, trim, kinda muscley-mesomorphic and a size 4. So I'm OK with my broad shoulders and broad back. I feel pretty fit, except for the occasional shoulder issue and I'm more fit and lean and healthy than most non-swimming women my age. So I'm good. I think most of the women on this forum seem to be good. :woot: We're all doing pretty well in the cardiovascular department. And, as NKFrench was observing, the occasional wardrobe adjustment works wonders too.
Oh, Mr. Fortress is good with it too, but he's got even broader shoulders.
My husband was happy I lifted weights the day I decided I wanted the piano moved, and did not want to wait for him, and did it myself. He has also commented that when moving furniture he does not have to call one of his guy friends. He got me into weightlifting 25 years ago, and he did not continue, but I did. Not a size 4, but still fit and fairly buff in 8-10's!
My husband was happy I lifted weights the day I decided I wanted the piano moved, and did not want to wait for him, and did it myself. He has also commented that when moving furniture he does not have to call one of his guy friends. He got me into weightlifting 25 years ago, and he did not continue, but I did. Not a size 4, but still fit and fairly buff in 8-10's!
Well, I'm sure I'm shorter than you. :rofl: Isn't it great to be able to move stuff?
Not sure about that, only 5-4. When I went to Nationals in 2004, it was the land of tall like tree women, man are swimmers tall.
I love being able to do my own thing, and not have to ask for help. And if someone thinks my muscles are too big and not feminine, well, it is better than having fat flapping in the wind.
(Did you mean the 2004 Olympics ?)
Oops... Work blocks the message boards, but lets me have a 1hr quota every day in 10 minute intervals... it sucks cause all my resposes are (obviously) rushed.
:groovy:
I'm more a fan of the Venus and Serena Williams body types.
I think Serena was in SI Swimsuit a couple years ago. Had the best bod of all the gals in the mag, in my opinion.
