This weekend was our Pacific Masters Championships. It was a close battle between WCM and USF and I don't know who won at this very moment. I don't care.
You see, I left right before the 1000 today (the last event) right after the last relays. I watched some great swims today. Amazing swims. My friend Brendon swam a 2:03 200 fly and really hit his taper (as he's not going to Nationals)- we were teasing about how he does really well the week after a tapered meet. He seemed to finally figure it out this time.
My friend Stephen called me tonight and told me that Brendon also had a great 1000, was warming down, had a heart attack and died. He was 35. I was stunned. I've been crying since then trying to make sense of it all. It doesn't make sense.
I called some other friends and no one else can believe it either. Suddenly, the meet doesn't matter, swimming doesn't matter, what matters is that we lost a really great guy today. He was always so happy, funny, and loved to tell jokes. He was really good natured and fun to be around. I will miss him terribly.
I am so sorry!!! I was at that meet and like you left before the 1000. I don't know what to say. It"s a shocking tragedy. My prayers are with his family and team mates.
Brendon loved the fly events. If you look at the Pacific Masters website partial results are up for our meet. He had an awesome meet! He was really happy.
I e-mailed Michael Moore and asked if we could either name the meet after Brendon or at least have a memorial award for one of the men's 35-39 fly events.
Karen,
What Jeanette said is so true. Hopefully, with time, you'll be able to remember him and smile without tears. Take care of yourself. Allow yourself time to grieve. I recently lost someone very special to me and I didn't take time to grieve the loss. I tried to stay busy and ignore the pain. It works well for a while...then it catches up with you. If you can, take off from work and go home. Another big hug coming your way.....:(
I'd love to go home. We get 10 sick days/year. Between sick kids and Pacific Champs (Fri) and Nationals (3 days off) I can't go home.
I have to tell you though what my son did last night. Stephen called me with the news and I couldn't believe it. After a few minutes I started crying. Patrick (PJ), 5, asked what was wrong and I told him (the other 2 were asleep, thankfully). Patrick diappeared for awhile into his room.
About 15 minutes later, I was still crying, and PJ came up to me with a picture he had drawn (to cheer me up), a felt box (for jewelry) filled with rosary beads so I could thank God for my friend, another picture, a ring with a dove on it, and a copy of the poem "Rainbow Bridge". I can post it for you if you're interested. Our vet gave it to us when our 2 dogs died last year with 4 months of each other. That poem gave (still gives) PJ great comfort when thinking about our dogs. He thought it would help me to remember that I will see Brendon again one day.
I am not only thankful that I got to have Brendon as a friend, but that I have an amazing son, who is very intuitive, thoughtful, and kind.
I put the poem back in PJ's room. He keeps it on his bulletin board. I'll try and figure out how to scan it tonight. I don't think I can type it. I can't even read the thing without completely losing it! It's so well written and something I believe in deeply. It helps me keep that whole death thing in perspective. Well, at least it gives me a coping mechanism.
Hi All,
Karen, I'm very sorry to hear the news about Brendon Wen. He sounds like someone we all would have enjoyed meeting.
One of the most thoughtful and wonderful sentiments expressed in this thread is your idea about how USMS and Pacific Masters could remember your friend -- perhaps by naming the meet or having a special award for the butterfly events. As a member of the USMS Endowment Fund Board of Governors, I'd like to gently and respectfully suggest another idea.
Last year, when Masters swimmer David Gregg passed away at a swim meet in Virginia, I posted the attached article by John Feinstein, which was also reprinted in SWIM Magazine. That article really helped a lot of us put the event into perspective.
When we published the article in the magazine, we added the following side-bar note about memorial gifts to the USMS Endowment Fund:
USMS Endowment Memorial Gifts
The United States Masters Swimming Endowment Fund was designated as one of the recipients of memorial contributions in memory of David Gregg. As a result, several generous contributions were received by the Endowment along with numerous memorial statements about the contributions David made to his family, his team and his community.
The Endowment Fund continues to be a vehicle for memorials, celebrations and considered philanthropy by the swimming community because its good works will serve us all and help keep the spirit and memory alive of people like David Gregg, Doc Counsilman and others in the process. Because of the generosity of Masters swimmers, their friends and families, the Endowment Fund has now grown to over $150,000.00 and grants have been made in each of the last two years to support worthy research.
Information about the USMS Endowment Fund can be obtained from Doug Church, Chair of the Board of Governors of the Endowment Fund, DChurch@cchalaw.com, P.O. Box 10, Noblesville, IN 46061; 317-773-2190. The Endowment Fund is actively soliciting grant requests for the 2004 calendar year.
Following the publication of this article and side-bar, many more people contributed to the USMS Endowment fund in memory of David Gregg. In fact, it was a little overwhelming. What we discovered was that people truly appreciated having another way to remember one of their own.
Again, my condolences to you, your teammates, and the friends and family of Brendon Wen. I'm sad I never had an opportunity to meet him.
Best Wishes,
Bill
So sorry for your loss.... :(
A had a roommate in college die when he was 19 and I was 21 at the time, ironically in a swimming accident. I know what it's like to lose a good friend way before their time. Hang in there...
