Depression

Former Member
Former Member
Ok, here it is. This takes a serious amount of courage for me to post this due to the obvious shame if feel here, but, I think it may help someone out there who is also experiencing the same type of situation..The following is an e-mail I wrote to Jim Thorton reaching out for him for guidance and help in this terrible time. Jim: I have not posted in two months now due to my severe depression. My wife of 25 years (whom I love dearly left me on 5 Aug.--no hope for our marriage). I attempted an honest crack at Jerry's way out that night...and one other time. So far this past two months I have spent one 12 day stint in the hospital and another week stint in the hospital attempting to deal with this very, very serious problem. To date, I have been unable to shake this thing. I see no hope for my life and frankly the pain and torment is so great that I really do not give a rat’s rear end about anything at this point. My problem is a simply one. I HATE being locked up..and all these units can do for guys like me is lock us up. Heck, I take Jerry's way any day to the padded cell stuff. Any suggestions. Currently I am on Celexa and the pain and suffering are horrendous to say the least. Kindest regards, Tom Ellison
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  • Former Member
    Former Member
    Originally posted by Tom Ellison ... I see no hope for my life and frankly the pain and torment is so great that I really do not give a rat’s rear end about anything at this point. My problem is a simply one. I HATE being locked up..and all these units can do for guys like me is lock us up. Heck, I take Jerry's way any day to the padded cell stuff. Any suggestions. Currently I am on Celexa and the pain and suffering are horrendous to say the least. Kindest regards, Tom Ellison Tom, indeed I was thinking last week that you didn't post in a while. I was also down on myself at times when things I prepare for don't go my way, and from these instances I am motivated to suggest on how to keep on going anyway: . ) do not accept forceful 'help', like your mentioning of "...all these units...", Celexa which I don't know it but might be a mind altering substance, drugs; gently cut off these kind of avenues, and heal naturally; .) ease off on yourself; you should be your best friend now, in time of crisis; start pleasing yourself above anything else with simple enjoyments in life like treating yourself to ice cream, playing chess, watching light movies, benefitting from the simple friendship and needs of animals, listening to music that gave you energy at your best in life, staying late at night, meeting people who care and appreciate you; .) meet many of us, women and men from the USMS forum from whom you have lots of appreciation regarding your identity, as opposed to the "...no hope..." recently thrown at you; in a swimming competition soon to be, we have lots of jokes and hopes to share with you, when we meet.
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  • Former Member
    Former Member
    Originally posted by Tom Ellison ... I see no hope for my life and frankly the pain and torment is so great that I really do not give a rat’s rear end about anything at this point. My problem is a simply one. I HATE being locked up..and all these units can do for guys like me is lock us up. Heck, I take Jerry's way any day to the padded cell stuff. Any suggestions. Currently I am on Celexa and the pain and suffering are horrendous to say the least. Kindest regards, Tom Ellison Tom, indeed I was thinking last week that you didn't post in a while. I was also down on myself at times when things I prepare for don't go my way, and from these instances I am motivated to suggest on how to keep on going anyway: . ) do not accept forceful 'help', like your mentioning of "...all these units...", Celexa which I don't know it but might be a mind altering substance, drugs; gently cut off these kind of avenues, and heal naturally; .) ease off on yourself; you should be your best friend now, in time of crisis; start pleasing yourself above anything else with simple enjoyments in life like treating yourself to ice cream, playing chess, watching light movies, benefitting from the simple friendship and needs of animals, listening to music that gave you energy at your best in life, staying late at night, meeting people who care and appreciate you; .) meet many of us, women and men from the USMS forum from whom you have lots of appreciation regarding your identity, as opposed to the "...no hope..." recently thrown at you; in a swimming competition soon to be, we have lots of jokes and hopes to share with you, when we meet.
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